You are a cactus named Fred.

Posted under Story On By Chief

You are a cactus named Fred. One day you get tired of standing around in the desert all day, so you decide to walk to the nearest city to pursue your dream of becoming a professional wrestler.
 Once there you find a local talent scout who takes one look at your physique and immediately offers you a job. You accept and the rest is history.
 You are on top of the world as the most famous and well liked Professional Wrestler in the world, but then everything changed when
 that same athletic woman that hired you returned to town.

You are now under suspicion of murder. The authorities have decided that it is in their best interest that you be charged with murder.
 You have a private talk with the wrestling commisioner and reveal your troubled past.
 He insists that you stay out of trouble and prove your innocence.
You agree to do so and try to get back into the ring.
 You lean in for a kiss with the commisioner.
 His face turns a shade of red and then he falls backwards onto the ground. You stand over him and punch him in the head. He falls backwards and you grab his throat and squeeze.
 You scream, "I'm innocent damn it! I just have a bad temper, I'm not a murderer!"
 The crowd goes wild and cheers for you. They love you and see your potential after all.
"Right, showtime." You say as your opponent appears.
 Your opponent is Judge Randy "The Law" Reinholt. You have to defeat him to prove your innocense! The crowd goes wild as he approaches the ring.
 "This is going to be a good match." He says. He begins to circle the ring. You begin to circle the ring as well. The audience goes wild!
 You level up and gain the following cactus wrestler power:
 Your body turns a deep purple and you grow a large goatee. The fans are cheering for your victory!
 The crowd goes so wild and the pit becomes so activated that a tornado of metal folding chairs appears in the ring.
 It crashes into The Law and cuts him in half. Big Ben from Mount Rushmore shows up and says, "The law is dead!"

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