You are Count Loveala, a vampire who runs a supernatural dating website. Business' is not doing that well since you were found out to be only half-vampire.
Your father is a vampire hunter and the head of your family's business empire. The whole world knows about you but no one seems to care much about you. You have been called many names by different people including "Lone Wolf", "The Countess", "The Vampire Queen" and even "The Little Vampire".
You walk into your office as you hear someone knock on the door. You open it quickly and see a beautiful woman in a long black dress with a veil covering her face. She looks over at you and says, "Good morning, my name is Maria. I am here for an interview."
You are interviewing Maria for an unusual position and explain to her the odd duties of a Countcellor:
"Maria, I need someone to do some research on vampires for my company. My father has a large collection of books on vampires and has hired me to find out more about them so that we can incorporate their knowledge into our own company."
Maria smiles at you and says, "Yes, I would love to help your father with his research. I have read most of those books and know quite a bit about vampires."
You smile back at her and ask her if she wants to come in. She agrees and walks inside your office, closing the door behind her.
You lean in for a kiss with Maria.
She leans in slowly and passionately to you, feeling your hard member pressing against her thigh. You feel a warm glow spread through your body as you kiss her deeply.
As you break the kiss, Maria says, "I was wondering what you were doing this early in the morning. Most vampires don't get up before noon or later."
You laugh and say, "Not all of us are like you, Maria. Some of us must rise earlier than others."
Maria blushes and says, "Oh really? I didn't know that."
You tell Maria the following vampire facts that she could never learn in textbooks, but must learn on the streets:
a) Vampires are immortal. b) Vampires are able to walk in sunlight without burning. c) Vampires can control their bodies temperature and heartbeat. d) Vampires' eyesight is 20/20 and they can see in low light situations. e) Vampires' blood tastes sweet and is highly nutritious. f) Vampires are attracted to sunlight. g) Vampires can live anywhere without sunlight. h) Vampires can see in the dark. i) Vampires can smell in the dark. j) Vampires can taste in the dark. k) Vampires can hear in the dark.
You take a chance and hire Maria on the spot. You get to work on the newest exciting feature for your Supernatural dating site:
Vampire Matchmaking.
You spend the next few weeks searching the web for information on vampires and how to make your website more interesting for customers. You eventually decide that you want to create an online dating service for vampires. You start by creating a website that will be filled with pictures of beautiful women that are also vampires. You then add a small section where people can post questions about themselves and receive answers from other members of the community. You have already received hundreds of responses to your question about how long you have been a vampire.
Your site is a huge hit! All of the sexiest vampires are hooking up and it is all thank to you. You notice an unusual analytical anomaly: all the vampires using your site are also
single and looking for love. You decide to dig deeper into this phenomenon. You find that almost all the users are female. You wonder why there are so many single females on your site. You find a few websites dedicated to explaining the female side of the vampire life and discover that the reason for this is because of the unique and powerful attraction that vampires have for each other. You realize that all the single ladies that are using your dating site are looking for a mate. You decide to create an ad for your website that explains your vampire attraction.
You slap some fake vampire fangs on some beefy oiled up Jersey boys and get the perfect thirst trap picture to use for your ad. This makes all the single lady vampires go CRAZY with lust that you estimate that every female vampire on Earth is using your dating site to find love.
You set up a special section for the lonely vampires who are looking for love. You start to get lots of responses from the lonely vampires that are posting on this forum. You read through the replies and see all kinds of crazy stories about these women. Some of the women have been turned into vampires by their boyfriends. Others have been bitten by their ex-husbands. Still others were attacked by vampiric animals and turned. You find out that some of the women are looking for a mate, but don't know how to look for one. They are scared that they will be turned into a vampire and lose their families.
Then you finally realize it: all these "vampire" women are just lonely human females that are fans of Twilight and not actual vampires.
You are sitting in your office when you hear a knock on the door. You open the door and see Maria standing there. You are surprised to see her here early in the morning. You ask her if she wants to join you for coffee and a chat. Maria agrees and walks in the office. You order a cup of coffee and sit down in your chair. Maria takes a seat across from you. You ask her how she likes working for your father's company. Maria is very excited to hear about the new job and says, "I am loving my work at your father's company. It is so much fun.
You test Maria with a sudden line of inquiry about Twilight.
Maria blushes and says," I didn't know that vampires could be fans of the movie. I have never seen any of the movies myself. "You laugh at her response and say," Well, we are going to change that now. We are going to use your favorite vampire movie as the basis for our website. "Maria is excited to hear that and says," I can't wait to see what you come up with. "You get up and walk over to your computer and start typing away. You have been thinking about the best way to make your website stand out from all the other dating sites.
You base your new site off Maria's favorite vampire movie that is not Twilight:
The Vampire Diaries. You decide to use the main character, Elena Gilbert. She is a vampire who must choose between her family and her love for Damon Salvatore. You decide to make your website more like the TV show. You add a page for "Elena Gilbert" that has pictures of her from different angles. You have made the website look just like the TV show and even have a few scenes from the show in the background. You have also added a section for "Elena Gilbert" that asks questions about her life and includes some of the answers from the forums that you found on the web.
The moral of the story:
If you want to find love on the internet, you should use a website based on a vampire movie.
The next day you are back at your office and you are working on your new website. You find that Elena is the most popular female vampire on your site. You decide to put together a profile for her on your website. You add a lot of information about her, including an interesting fact about her. You write a short bio about her and add a couple of pictures of her. You have a total of 5 photos of her on your website. You decide to make the first picture of her a close up of her face.
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