Terry Cleans Up The Vortex

You are Terry, a friendly high school janitor who all the kids make fun of.  The kids call you "Stinky Terry" and even the other staff members laugh at you behind your back.  You are on your way to clean up an overflowing toilet when suddenly a swirling vortex opens in front of you. As you attempt to avoid it, you feel a sharp pain in your chest as if something has been stabbed through.

As you stagger away from the vortex, you hear someone calling out for help.
> look for my trusty mop and bucket

You run down the hallway, only to find that there is no one else around.  You quickly search the bathroom and then head back to where you left off. There is a mop sitting on top of a sink with two buckets beside it.
> grab mop and bucket and try to aid person calling for help

Grabbing the mop and bucket, you rush into the room and begin sweeping up any blood splatters.  After wiping them off, you see that your victim was still alive. He looks like he just got out of bed.
> ask him "what happened here and who made this giant mess?"

He asks you what happened and you tell him about the vortex opening in front of you. He tells you that he saw it too and that he heard some noise coming from outside his window.
> help him up and enter the vortex

You both get up and enter the vortex together.  When you arrive, you notice that it is much larger than the last time you were here. It seems to be moving faster now as well.
> pickup mob like a spear and chuck it through the vortex

The mop and bucket do not have enough force to break through the wall of the vortex.  They simply bounce against it instead.  This causes you to think that maybe they did not go far enough inside before hitting something or perhaps something hit them.
> go to the library and ask for books that deal with vortexes and how to clean them up

You decide to check out the nearby libraries first since you know that they might have more information on these things.  While you are looking through the bookshelves, you come across a book called "Vortexes." You pick it up and read it cover to cover.
> "oh no, to clean up the vortex we need to poop in a big pile on the 50 yard line during the big game!  the whole school will be there watching!"

Your plan works perfectly.  Everyone starts cheering when you throw the big pile of shit onto the field.  The crowd goes wild and the team wins easily.

Afterwards, everyone is happy again.