You are Jason and to celebrate 4th of July you put some fireworks around your house and set them off inside.
They all go off at once and the whole house blows up, killing you.
Your family had a tradition where every year on New Years Eve someone would make a wish for the new year. You made one that said it was going to be a good year. The next day you get hit by a car while crossing the street.
> You keep dying and coming back and suspect that you might be immortal!
You keep dying and coming back and suspect that you might be immortal!
You feel like you've been through this before...
"I just want to know what's wrong with me!" you say. "Why can't I stay dead?"
"Well," Doctor Jones says, "you're not dead yet."
"But I keep getting killed over and over again!"
> You show the doctor what you mean by jamming his stethoscope in your eye ball and puncturing your brain.
"Oh my god," he exclaims, "you're right. It's just a physical reaction to the pressure build-up in your eyes. We'll have to operate immediately to relieve the pressure, but we need to remove your eyes first so they don't explode from the pressure."
> You receive expensive unnecessary eye surgery.
You wake up in a strange place surrounded by other people who look exactly like you. This is a hospital, and you were brought here after being involved in an accident. You were saved thanks to your expensive health insurance policy. You didn't even know you had such a thing until now, but it looks like you're glad you do.
> You realize that you suddenly have the power of infinite sight: you can see from any distance.
This power has its advantages and disadvantages. Your vision is much better than normal, and you can see from great distances. However, if you focus too hard, your eyes will burn out. You also have to eat a lot more food now because of the strain on your system.
You continue to work on your inventions
You take a break from inventing and spend time with your friends.
> You gain 1000 lbs and attempt to see as far and deep into space as you possibly can.
You gain a massive amount of mass, and begin to float away from the planet. Eventually, you pass through the atmosphere and crash land somewhere in the desert of Mars.
You return to Earth and tell everyone about your adventure. They all think you're crazy, which you suppose is understandable.
After your story goes viral, you become rich and famous.
> You tell the world about the things you have seen while on Mars.
You tell the world about the things you have seen while on Mars. After hearing your stories, people start to wonder why you never returned home. You are eventually found and declared dead.
The next few years are spent trying to figure out how to colonize Mars. People are still skeptical though since nobody knows if there are actually aliens on Mars or if you were really just insane.
> You show undisputable proof that you were on Mars.
You show undisputable proof that you were on Mars. While this proves that you weren't lying, it doesn't prove anything else. The only thing you can do now is wait for something to happen.
One day, a man named John arrives at your door. He tells you that he believes you, and asks for your help in finding the aliens. You tell him yes.
> You hear John tell you about his alien encounter.
You hear John tell you about his alien encounter.
John tells you about his experience with the aliens. He claims that he saw them in the forest when he was a child.
He tells you about a cave near his house where he and his friends used to hide. He says that there is a secret entrance in the cave, which leads to a large room filled with strange objects and writings.
> You and John visit the alien cave.
You and John visit the alien cave. When you enter, you find it empty except for a single chair. You sit down in it, and John sits beside you.
"So, John, what did you see?" you ask.
"It's hard to explain..." he replies. "There was a huge, glowing blue light. And then, it started flashing rapidly.
> You are so fat that your weight breaks the chair and you fall onto a secret button that was hidden under the chair.
You are so fat that your weight breaks the chair and you fall onto a secret button that was hidden under the chair.
You quickly push the button and a portal opens up behind you. You run through it and end up in a new world.
You fall asleep
You fall asleep and dream of a world where you are thin and happy.
> John shakes you awake and you look around your surroundings.
John shakes you awake and you look around your surroundings. You're in a small hut made of wood and stone. There are some plants growing nearby and several chickens roaming around in the grass. In front of you is a beautiful woman wearing a long white dress and holding some flowers. She smiles at you and begins to sing.
> You ask the woman for her name.
You ask the woman for her name.
"My name is Sarah," she says. "I am a goddess."
"Wow," you say. "That's amazing."
"No, it isn't," she says. "You should be thanking me."
"Thanking you? For what?"
"For giving you the chance to fulfill your destiny," she replies.
> You ask Sarah what your destiny is.
You ask Sarah what your destiny is.
"Your destiny is to save the universe," she says. "And I'll help you."
"How?" you ask.
"Well, I'm going to give you a special sword," she says. "Then you have to go to this place called the Abyss and get this book."
"Abyss?" you ask.
> You look at Sarah seductively.
You look at Sarah seductively.
"Just tell me one thing," you say. "Are you sure we can trust you?"
"Of course!" she says. "I'd never lie to you, because I love you."
"Okay," you reply. "But remember- I'm not a very trusting person."
> You use your infinite sight to see Sarah's true intentions.
You use your infinite sight to see Sarah's true intentions.
Sarah's eyes glow red as she takes a step towards you. She raises her hand and points it directly at your face. You feel the energy from her touch and you immediately feel like you've been hit by a truck. Your vision blurs and you collapse to the ground.
> You wake up and see John has been defending you from Sarah.
You wake up and see John has been defending you from Sarah.
"Oh thank god you're okay," John says. "What happened?"
"She tried to kill me," you say.
"What?!" John exclaims. "Why would she try to kill you?"
You see John has learned of his own superpower:
he can detect lies.
You look at John and notice that he looks angry. His lips are pursed together tightly and he is clenching his fists.
"John, what's wrong?" you ask.
"Nothing," he snaps. "I'm fine."
You press on, asking again, "John? What's wrong?"
"Fine! I'm fine!"
> You lean in for a kiss.
You lean in for a kiss.
Suddenly, John stops you dead in your tracks. He grabs your shoulders and pushes you back.
"Don't even think about it," he says. "We're just friends."
"You mean... you don't want to kiss me?" you ask.
"Of course I do," he says. "But I'm not going to."
The moral of the story:
don't make out with someone who doesn't want to kiss you.
You walk away feeling hurt and confused.
You walk away feeling hurt and confused.
"What's gotten into him?" you wonder. "All he had to do was say no."
"Maybe he's just shy," you say to yourself. "Or maybe he's not attracted to me anymore."
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