Herbert Wallace, rogue horticulturalist that creates new plant hybrids in people’s garden without their permission

Posted under Episode 147, Story On By Chief

You attend the local home and garden show to wreak havoc. When no one is looking, you graft a dandelion onto a prize-winning rose bush.

> You take your own advice! You don't have time for this! You quickly get up from the couch, grab your pistol, and rush out of the room. The door slams behind you as you run down the hall. The next day at work, you find that everyone has been talking about what happened yesterday. Some people think it was funny.

You ask Jenny, who you have a crush on, "What do you think about it Jenny? Do you think it's cool?".

She looks at you with a face that says she knows exactly what you mean. You both hug each other. The two of you spend most of the rest of the week together, but then something happens... A few days later, you go back to the same place where you met Jenny.

You notice the rosebush you tried to sabotage has taken over the entire convention center.

It seems like there is nothing that can stop it now.

You realize the rosebush is growing like a weed - a dandelion. You will have to take it out at the root. You strap on a backpack filled with weed killer and clamber into the city sewer system.

When you reach the bottom, you see a large pipe covered with green vines. You climb inside and start pumping the drain. Within minutes, the water level drops by half an inch. It appears that the rosebush is already dead. "I'm sorry," you say to yourself. "The only thing I can do is kill it".

You sprays the roots with weed killer.

As soon as they're all dead, you pull the plug.

You pull the plug on the city's sewer system and drain all the life giving water from the city.

Your body begins to rot away. Your soul leaves your body and floats through the air towards the sun.

You are reborn as an apple tree with an orange tree grafted onto it.

> You time passes... Year 17 "This is just a waste of money!" You complain to your mother. "Yes, it is". She replies. You sit in front of the TV watching the news. It shows pictures of bombs going off around the world. People are running in fear. Suddenly, the camera pans to you.

You have grown to cover the city. Just then, the little boy who you love, and whom you have given some branches to in the past to make furniture, asks if he can chop you down to build a house. You agree.

He does so and you grow taller. Soon, you are standing on top of a skyscraper. You watch the world burn. Then, everything goes black.