Hearing the repeated blaring of the alarms, you jolt awake.

Posted under Story On By Chief

Hearing the repeated blaring of the alarms, you jolt awake. It hits you that today is the day for the mission that you've been preparing for. Tossing on your black and red suit, you load yourself with your equipment, before heading out. The moon shines a dim blue, under a cloudless night. As you approach the party, you're stopped by security. Flashing your access card, he moves aside, letting you in. Entering, you take a few glances around. You don't spot much out of the ordinary, save for a suspicious individual. You lock eyes with him, as
 the alarm goes off again.
"What's going on?" You ask, as he looks at you.
"You'll see." He says, stepping back.
 You look up in horror as you see:
 A man in a full body suit, armed to the teeth with an assault rifle. You try to run, but he's faster than you are.
 This is not the first time you've been hunted, but something is different as you notice the man moving at seemingly inhuman speeds.
 Your heart starts pounding, as you hear the alarm go off again.
"Are you alright?" The man asks, stopping you from fleeing. "I'm sorry about this..."
 You unleash your secret weapon.
 A beam of light strikes his chest, causing him to fall down. You quickly move to help him up, only to be hit in the head by a knife thrown by the attacker.
 You look at the cross you are wearing and realize you have God on your side and nothing can stop you!  You continue through the building and find your target Mr Klein eating a $30 salad in office alone.  You enter and lock the door behind you.  Mr Klein seems to have been expecting you.
 He stands up and walks towards you, as you attack him.
"What the fuck!?" He spits, as you start to cut into his arm.
 Mr Klein jumps out of his seat and you notice his arm immediately start to heal.  Your first thought is nanomachines, but Mr Klein tells you, "I've made a pact with Demons, killing me isn't going to be so easy for you Rex!"
 You turn around, seeing him holding a pistol. You know it's no use, and start to get ready to die.
 You fall to your knees and pray.  The cross you are wearing becomes supercharged and glows a bright white light.
 Suddenly, you feel a cold breeze blow over you. You look up and see a man in a black hooded cloak standing above you.
 The man in the hood is Jesus.  Jesus removes his hood revealing a large face tattoo of:
 "Truth, Justice, and the American Way."
"Jesus Christ!" You scream, as Jesus laughs.
"I knew you'd come back one day."
 You and Jesus fight akimbo style to take down Mr Klein, but his regenerative powers prove a formidable force to overcome.
 You finally manage to knock him out, as you notice the door to the office open. Two men step in, both dressed in black body suits and armed with assault rifles.
 It's the most evil duo known to man:
 Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. They don't even bother to mask their faces.
"Who the hell did this?!" You ask, as the two men walk towards you.
 Jesus pulls out the big guns:
 "I'm sorry my son, I didn't want to do this... But he was a threat to the American way of life."
 It happened so quickly that you didn't even notice right away, but when you look to see Bill Gates and Steve Jobs you only notice their skeletons standing frozen in the doorway.  Mr Klein attempts to escape through a secret exit under his desk, but you catch him and say, "
 You will pay for this, you will pay for all of this!" Mr Klein screams, but he doesn't have time to react as Jesus shoots him in the head and you take his place.
 Mission accomplished!  You lean in for a kiss with Jesus.
 You taste blood, mixed with the flavor of sin. You feel a cold breeze on your face. You look up and see the hole in your skull.