Julius Caesar, emperor of Rome

Posted under Episode 5, Story On By Chief

You are Julius Caesar, emperor of Rome. You are at a colosseum watching people fight to the death.

> You stand up and yell out to the crowd "All these men are weaker than I. I will now fight any challengers, all at the same time!". 344 men rush at you from the stands. You look at your wife and she says.

"You can't win this way! We need to stop them!" Julius looks over at his wife and smiles. He then turns back to you and says. "I think we should let them kill each other". You turn around and see that the crowd has stopped fighting and is staring at you with fear in their eyes.

> You grow to 100 ft tall and start chucking people into the ocean.

The crowd stops fighting and starts running away. You throw a man into the sea and he sinks instantly. A few more men follow suit. The crowd begins to disperse as they realize what you have done. They begin to run for it. You continue throwing men into the water until there is nothing left but a few fish swimming about. You walk over to your wife who is crying.

> you pat your wife on the butt.

You laugh and say "It's good to be king". Then you grab your sword and walk off towards the audience. Julius watches you leave and smiles.

> You pat your wife on the butt harder.

Julius laughs and says "That was fun, but not quite enough". Julius walks over to you and grabs you by the throat. "What do you want?" "I want you to marry me". Julius smiles and nods. "Very well, I shall give my word that I will obey your every command".

> You jump in the ocean and swim away.

You jump into the ocean and swim away. Julius smiles and says "Well, that was easy".

> You discover the lost city of atlantis in the ocean.

The next day, you wake up and find that Julius has disappeared. You search through the ruins looking for him, but you don't find anything. You go back to sleep hoping that he'll return tomorrow. A month passes...

> You make a replica of Julius out of old grape stems and carry him around your best friend.

A week later, you wake up and find that Julius has returned. He carries a huge wooden statue of himself. He smiles and says "Good morning friends, I'm glad to see you again". You smile and nod and hug him tightly. "Where did you get this?" "My dad made it when I was little". "How much does it weigh?"

You say "Julian, where have you been?"

"Oh, I've been hiding under the bed, I've been trying to figure out how to escape". "Why haven't you tried to escape yet?" "Because I've been so scared of being alone". "Do you like being alone?" "Yes, because I feel safe here. I know if I try to escape, I won't come back home".

> You speak to your lawyer.

You ask your lawyer "Can you help me escape?" He replies "Of course, why wouldn't you?" You tell him that Julius wants you to marry him. Your lawyer tells you to wait while he goes to talk to Julius. When he returns, he tells you that he thinks you're crazy and that you shouldn't marry him.

> You ask to marry the lawyer instead.

Your lawyer agrees to marry you anyway. Julius is very happy and kisses you goodbye. You head back to the palace and tell your family what happened. Your father is furious and orders you to be executed immediately. Your mother is even angrier and threatens to kill you herself. She doesn't however, and instead gives you one last chance. You agree to marry the lawyer.

> You go to the wedding.

You go to the wedding dressed as the lawyer. Julius is ecstatic and hugs you. Everyone else is shocked and upset. Julius is happy too and kisses you. After the ceremony, you and Julius kiss passionately and embrace. Afterwards, you and your new husband celebrate your marriage. You live happily ever after.