Cory, formerly human, now a swarm of nanobots

Posted under Episode 277, Story On By Chief

You are Cory, or at least, you were. In your quest to stop the anti-cyborg terrorists from blowing up a hospital, you were knocked out. With help from your bank it's you were able to absorb most of the blast, at the cost of your body.

But sometimes, fate is strange. You are now a swarm of nanobots, possessed by the spirit of Officer Cory. You were betrayed by members of the police and now you want revenge. You slither to the house of your former captain, Jason, and tell him what happened. He seems surprised that you would betray him, but he agrees to help you.

You take off in his car and head towards the city center where the Anti-Cybernetic terrorist group is located.

> You take the form of a bucket with two eyeholes and park yourself outside the meeting room.
You walk into the meeting room and see several people sitting around a table discussing something. A man stands up and says "So, I was just wondering who all these people are."

> You the man introduces himself to the table as Senator Armstrong. you sneak into the meeting as the bucket chilling the champagne.
The terrorists go through the entire plan. How they're going to rig an explosive to a politician, and then send a message to the news company.
Senator Armstrong volunteers wear the explosive.  Then he leaves to get the bomb.
You slither up his leg as he walks and fall into his pocket.
You bite little bites on his groin area and he dances in pain. The group looks at him in disbelief. He says "nothing is wrong" and the group looks away.
Then you crawl to the detonator and break it. The bomb can't go off now. You go outside of the system and reformat some files.
Javier Bardem, local comptroller, asks the Senator, "Is that a swarm of nanobots in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?"  The senator screams in horror as the terrorists realize what has happened.

> You emerge from the senator's pocket. The terrorists shoot at you, but you disperse into millions of nanobots, so the bullets miss.
You watch as the terrorists enter the room. They're wearing explosive vests and holding assault rifles.
You slither into the air system and disperse into millions of nanobots.
Joshua, the Monkey with a traffic cone on his head, realizing the detonator is broken, so he replaces it with a 10 second timer and accidentally triggers it. You escape into the sewers, but just barely.
The explosion kills the senator, the terrorists, and everyone in the room. The terrorists wanted to send a message, but you made sure that the only thing that got through was death.

> You are trying to leave the hotel when you are interrupted by Hideo Kojima who hands you a box of memes and says "you'll know when the time is right"
You open the box and it explodes, and a wave of memes hits you. You get so distracted by the memes that you forget you were in the middle of an evacuation.
You list off the top 10 memes:
10. Do a barrel roll
9. Dat boi
8. John Cena
7. David Attenborough
6. Apex
5. Steven Universe
4. SpongeBob
3. Deadpool
2. Dolan
1. Ned Flanders
Your memes run out and you prepare to face the terrorists.
You level up and gain the following meme skills to fight the terrorists with:
Dank Memes (infinity)
Big League Chew (5)
The terrorists shoot at you with their assault rifles.

> You spray them with nano Dank Memes.
The terrorists laugh as your memes bounce harmlessly off their bulletproof vests.
The terrorists shoot at you with their assault rifles.

> You hit the terrorists with a "Disgustin" meme, its a critical.
One of the terrorists throws his gun down and runs away. The other terrorists call him a "pussy".
The terrorists shoot at you with their assault rifles.
The terrorists suddenly fall dead from oral cancer. You think to yourself "Well, that's weird."
The terrorists suddenly fall dead from oral cancer. You think to yourself "Well, that's weird." Your cell phone starts ringing and you pick up.
"Hello, I'm sorry about this. The terrorists have been taken care of, but you must be weary from all this. Here, I'll send help."
The moral of the story: oral cancer ruins lives.