Mike Carter, one of the employees of Reindrob’s Industries®

Posted under Episode 212, Story On By Chief

You are Mike Carter, one of the employees of Reindrob's Industries®. You are responsible for sending random products to the AIPD by Apolo, the CEO of the company. Today is the day you're going to tell your boss that you're tired of bad treatment of his employees and you're quitting work.

It's a sunny day in the middle of spring. You get out of your bed and walk to the bathroom.

> You practice your quitting speech in front of the mirror.
You walk into the bathroom and look at yourself in the mirror. Then you remember that you need to practice your quitting speech because you're so nervous.
You pull out your Reindrob's incredible Gene Splicer and decide for an extreme change. Then you realize you don't have a mirror and you put it back in your pants.
You walk back to bed and look at yourself in the mirror that's hanging on the wall.

> You notice your appearance has changed in the following ways:.
You used to be an average looking guy, now you are a weird looking goblin.
"What the hell happened to me?"
You realize that when you put the gene splicer back in your pants, it was stuck in the on mode. You continue to rapidly changes forms: a goblin to a troll and then a lizard.
Now you are a weird looking fish-man.
"This is not good. I'm supposed to quit my job today."

> You go into the office, but nobody recognizes you. They think you are the new boss, who is supposed to start work today.
You arrive at the office and get out of your car. The guards at the gate ask for your identification.
You hop on Reindrob's floating motorcycle and then you remember the gene splicer is still in your pants and the vibrations from the motorcycle are making it go haywire again.  You're growing a long prehensile tail and your skin is turning blue.
You need to get out of this situation fast.
You level up, you gain the following gene splicing powers:
Carnivorous Plant Creation, Extra Body Part and Overencumbered.
Your tail grows longer and you feel dizzy. It looks like you need to be in water to survive.

> You jump in water fountain the atrium of your office building.
You fall in the water fountain and your tail recedes into your body. You are soaking wet and you can't change back to your original form. You have become a blue amphibian person with lots of extra parts.

> You look down at your new body and name the extra parts:.
You name your new body parts: foot fins, leg fins, arm fins and hand paddles. You wonder what kind of creature you are now.

> You call Amit Patel, technical support hotline agent for Reindrob® products.
Amit is a young guy who is working at the technical support help line. He has a weird sense of humor and very young looking, but he knows everything about Reindrob® products.

> You say "Help, I'm a....thing"
"Hello, I'm Amit. How may I help you today?"
"I'm a creature."
"Alright... Are you human? Or animal?"
"In the middle. And with lots of extra parts."
"Are you a cyborg?"
"No, I'm alive."
"Alive? That's not possible. Are you an artwork?"
"Then what are you?
Amit says, "Did you try turning it off and back on again?"
"No, I can't reach the switch."
"Then how can I help you?"
You're getting angry at him. "Look, I have a tail and lot's of extra bits.
Amit says, "Bear with me, only 10 more diagnostic questions to go"
"Never mind, I'll talk to someone else."
Amit says "Alright sir, thank you for choosing Reindrob® products."
You hang up and call the technical support again.

> You this time, you are transferred to Reindrob himself.
You find yourself in a room with a teleporter. Next to it is Dr. Reindrob.
Dr. Reindrob turns around and is shocked and confused by your appearance. You give him your quitting speech.
"Dr. Reindrob, this is the third time I'm quitting. Each time something went wrong. This time, I had a gene splicer and it went on by itself and I turned into a creature."
Dr. Reindrob says, "A creature? Let me see."
He looks at you and is in shock.

> You say "You just noticed I'm a creature!?!"
Dr. Reindrob says, "You're a creature?"
He didn't notice at all. You were standing in front of him for 3 minutes and he didn't even notice.
You demand that as part of your severance package that Dr Reindrob help you turn back to normal.
Dr. Reindrob says, "How did you get into this mess?"
You explain the situation to Dr. Reindrob and he understands and agrees to help you.
Dr. Reindrob says, "First, we need to put you into a tank."
You are put into a tank and the water feels great since you've been in the rub for several hours.
Dr. Reindrob says, "Since I don't know what creature you have become, all we can do is wait."
You wait several hours and nothing happens.
Frustrated at the lack results, you decide to use the gene splicer of Dr Reindrob. You hope that you'll turn back to normal, but instead you turn into a white mouse. More specifically a Albino rat.
You scamper around the lab as fast as you can.
You bite Dr Reindrob's ankle and he starts to transform into a Albino rat as well.
You and Dr. Reindrob run into the streets of California, declaring your new rodent nature.
The moral of the story: If it looks too good to be true, it probably is.