Virtual Jim, captain of a crab ship that sails the North Atlantic seas and starts a religion

Posted under Episode 160, Story On By Chief

You are Jim, the captain of a crab ship that sails the North Atlantic seas. Jason is your calm and steady first mate, and Tony is your wisecracking chief engineer and cook. One day you get blown off course and land on a strange island. There is an old man on the island. He approaches you and says...

You wake up on a large wooden platform. You see the captain and first mate standing there in front of you.
"Where am I?" you ask.
"Somewhere safe," the captain says.


> You say "Was the ship destroyed in the storm?"
"It was destroyed by a raiding party of cutthroats loyal to the East India Company," the captain says. "We got away with barely our lives."

You look out to see and see the East India Company ship crash into nearby rocks. The whole crew swims to shore.
 You see that same green glow you saw in the storm.
"The island! It's glowing!" you say.
You realize it is no island at all, but a giant sea monster.

The sea monster starts swimming away. 
Your ship is dead in the water.

You build a bigger ship out of every tree on the island and try to escape off the turtle's back.
 You are immediately set upon by pirates. You land on a desert island and have to survive there for years.


> You take your knife and stab the island to see if it's alive or not.
You stab the island. The island doesn't like that. It opens its mouth and swallows you whole. It takes three days for you to die of dehydration, starvation and suffocation.
Good night.


> You reassert your dominance over the crew by smacking Tony and Jason! You then make a plan to escape the belly of the sea monster.
You smack the cook and the mechanic. The rest of the crew is impressed by your toughness.
"Okay," you say. "We need to gather supplies for a long trip."
"What about water?"

Jason says, "Water? Your a ghost!" 
"We have unlimited water!"
"No, you don't!" says the captain. "We need to conserve water. We only have five days of water left. Once that's gone, we all die."

Tony prays to the god Dasani for rain. The skies open and a hard rain falls, filling the ship's water barrels. 
The next day, you sail for the nearest island. You find an island with a beautiful waterfall and fresh water.
"What's the name of this place?" asks the captain.

Jason says, "I think we are in a giant frog's butthole with plently of fresh water!"

"No, this island is called Jamaica!"
You all sail to the New World.

You land and declare Jamaica to be renamed to Jimaica.
 You build a small village and fort.
As for the giant sea monster, he's still swimming around somewhere...


> You write new laws for the island. The first law of the island is...
You write a law system for the island.
The first law of Jimaica is that there must always be a shrine to the gods in the courtyard of the fort.

Jason asks, "Who is god?" and you respond, "It's me, Jim Christ!"

The second law of Jimaica is that there must always be a strong military on the island.
"What is army?" asks Jason.

Jason joins the Jimaican army. 
He asks you, "Should I kill the enemy with one strong blow to the head?"
You respond, "No! You should capture the enemy and bring them back so they can join our army!"


> You command Jason to build a new p.o.w. camp near the fort.
You tell Jason to build a p.o.w. camp near the fort. He builds it next to a poisonous swamp.

Jason asks, "What is swamp?"

As you are explaining what a swamp is, the whole camp is filled with poisonous gas. You all die of poisoning.
You leave a legacy that will be remembered forever...