Your name is Pharaoh Khufu. You rule over all of Egypt. The year is 2580BC. You head over to the construction site of the new Pyramid with your entourage. You look around and survey the construction of the soon to be finished Great Pyramid. One of your councilors approaches you. He bows deeply and hands you a note. The note reads... Dear Pharaoh, I have been watching the progress of the great pyramid with great interest. After careful thought, I believe that I have found a better design for it. > You say "Sorry, I'm not falling for your Pyramid scheme, we will keep my original design." You angrily tell your councilor to throw the note in the trash and keep the original design. Your councilor quickly shrugs and does what you say. You return to the main site with your head held high. > You can't stop thinking about what the design might be. You order your councilor to go in the ancient dumpster and retrieve the design. You are able to grab the design out of the hands of your councilor before he has a chance to see it. You unfold it and you can't believe your eyes. The design is for a pyramid with flat sides! > You summon the man who submitted this design. You get mad when you see the man who submitted this design. He is a short, hairy, unattractive little man. You shout at him for wasting your time with this stupid design. > You use the design as toilet paper in front of the man. You proceed to use the design as toilet paper in front of the man. He backs away slowly but you are relentless. "I will not let you stand here and insult me like this! The man, who is called Dannus Devitus, gets angry, too. He says he will build his own pyramid based on his design. You laugh and step closer to him. "You? What could you possibly do against the power of the state?" He looks at you and says he has connections in the military. You laugh again. Dannus builds a short but very wide pyramid and fills it with soldiers that are ready to fight you. He declares that you are nothing but a tyrant. The country divides itself between those that support you and those that support him. > You go to war with Dannus. You call your troops the Pointers. His troops are known as the Flatsiders. You decide you can't allow this man to insult you like this. You call all your soldiers to arms and prepare for war. He calls his own soldiers to arms and prepares for war. > You climb to the top of you tallest pyramid and watch the battle bellow. You climb to the top of your tallest pyramid and watch the battle bellow. You sit there with a drink in you hand, watching as your armies clash with his. > You are drinking limoncello, you see that Dannus is also drinking limoncello. You are so shocked by this, that you fall off the point of your pyramid and fall down every step wishing you had a flat sided pyramid. You are drinking limoncello when you see Dannus also drinking limoncello. You lean over the edge of the pyramid to shout at him in disbelief. > You summon a Mummy Elephant to take on Dannus' army. You summon a Mummy Elephant to take on Dannus' army but it gets scared and runs away. Your other soldiers think you are losing your touch so they lose heart in the battle. > You trip and fall down the side of your pyramid, down every painful step. You finally see the flaw of your design and realize that Dannus was right after all. You trip while climbing down the side of your pyramid and fall all the way to the bottom. You finally see the flaw of your design and realize that Dannus was right after all. > You try to make peace with Dannus and admit you were wrong. You try to make peace with Dannus and admit you were wrong. He is willing to forget about everything if you help him build a new pyramid but this time it has to be the right shape. > You say "We should compromise on the shape?" You think to yourself "We can't compromise. We have to stand firm on our beliefs. If we don't then where is the country headed? > You let Dannus decide the shape. Dannus chooses. Dannus chooses a shape that is a mixture of the two. You are disappointed though you realize that he is right and the compromise is necessary. One year later you hire someone to make a short fat statue of Dannus. > You decide to store all of the limoncello in the kingdom inside the pyramid. You decide to store all of the limoncello in the kingdom inside the pyramid. Over the years it transforms into lemoncello and everyone learns that at very high concentrations it is very toxic.
Pharaoh Khufu creates a pyramid scheme
Posted under Episode 157, Story On By Chief