EP375 #3

Posted under EP375 #3, Story On By Chief

You are Jason.  After killing your adopted son, Nicky, you realise that you need to kill all your adopted sons. You have 6 sons now since the murder of Nicky. Tony decides to live with Ellen, his adopted Mom and your Ex-wife (Ellen divorced you when you killed your youngest son Nicky).  You plan your next adopted son murder and decide to kill Darrel, your 78 year old adopted son who lives at an Abandoned White Castle which he calls "Retirement White Castle".

The day comes for you to go out and kill your next adopted son. You spend a lot of time in the car preparing yourself mentally and physically.
you enter the "retirement white castle" and it reeks of onion farts. It is not as bad as you thought. The smell washes over you and you feel like shit, but then again you are retired so its probably because of the onions.
You ask an employee for The Son Killer Spoon, which they procure from the back room and hand to you. After looking at the spoon, you secretely hide it in your sleeve and exit the White Castle with a new-found purpose.
You enter your car and head back home to kill Darrel.
you get home when you realize that you've left Darrel at the White Castle. You curse yourself for being so focused on killing Darrel that you forgot to go back for him.
You go back and sit in a booth with Darrel.  Darrel thinks you went missing to get him a secret gift.  You reveal your troubled past to Darrel and show him The Son Killer Spoon. He is pleased that you are going to kill him, but he doesn't realize that it's not a gift. He gives you a gift: A Live Beheading DVD Set.
> You behead Darrel with the Killer Spoon.
You enter the house with the Live Beheadings DVD. You go upstairs and kill Darrel in his room. You obtain his head and take it outside, where you put it in your unlocked car.
You toss out Cory's clothes which are covered in Darrel's blood and a nosey neighbor says, "Oh blood, that never comes outs!"
You go around the village and spread all of your adopted sons heads around. Returning to the banquet hall, you see Patty giving a speech about how she will uphold the law.
> You hold up your spoon and yell "I object!"
You start yelling, "I object!" causing a scene and ruining the speech.
Patty gets infuriated at you and runs up to you and slaps you.
> You pile-drive Patty into the ground.
You shove the Killer Spork into Patty's chest and impale her repeatedly.
She screams, much like a stuck pig, and a giant worm comes out with it. It's Mr. Peepoor. He consumes all of her screaming until she is just a wormfood husk.
This has to be stopped. You have stolen too many of Mr.Tom Jackson's sons.
Mr Tom Jackson bursts into the town hall and battles you for fatherhood dominance.
You are wielding Mr. Tom's Sons and fighting for your stolen sons. You punch and kick and shove, but he is too powerful. He knocks the swords out of your hands and starts punching you.
as you fight Mr Tom you see the other people at the meeting begin to shed their human skin and reveal the Peepoor's underneath. You scream in disgust and
You start yelling about how youre going to tell the whole town, but then realize there is no point because they were perfectly willing to eat the townspeople in the first place.
The Peepor's swallow the town into ground bellow. You hold of Mr Tom as you struggle in the underworld, and your dead dreams of retirement flash before your eyes.
Your stomach rumbles and you begin to fill unrelieved pain in the depths of your bowels.
You know what you have to do.  You pull down your pants and unleash the hellish White Castle torrent of brown pudding on the Peepoors.
The hord of Peepoors exploding into maggots and running away. Mr Tom is felled by the brown wave.
The moral of the 10:10 Story is to always shit before you start a revolution, and if you don't go Number 2 at least once a day then it builds up into an explosive mess of deadly proportions.