EP359 #1

Posted under EP359 #1, Story On By Chief

You are Red, a Crewpostor, who is a crewmate that has the skills of an Impostor. You are part of a colorful crew and Your color is Red. You are always called sus by the other crewmates and those crewmates are Blue, Cyan, Green, Yellow, Lime, And Purple, You are sick of this dog poop. You want to not be sus so you decide to not become sus. Suddenly some idiot with a dum sign on their head also know as cyan calls you "Sus" and he says you are not sus. He then starts calling you a liar. You say "I am NOT a lying liar!"
You say, "I am NOT a liar and I can prove it!" and show Cyan Cory's clothes. Then you get into a fight with him. You end up breaking his nose and knocking out his teeth. This proves that YOU ARE A LIEING LIAR!
> You start gaslighting Cyan.
You begin to maniplulate the lying thing into something that appears normal, "ah... You're just so mad."
The false accusations he receives for being a liar.
You bring Cyan into a secluded area and prove to him that you are not sus.  You show Cyan a Jim Christ action figure with 100 unique phrases and over 20 different movements. You then take a photo of you, Blue, and Green. You send Green and Blue to go get the others because you captured the evidence on film.
you press a small button on the Jim Christ action figure and it says that it has protected Cory your whole life. this action figure is also a recorder. you show this to cory. puts the other crewmates on the scene.
You drag Blue and Green to come see this.
When Blue and Green arrive, they see that Cyan is dead. They say that you lied to him, and then you killed him. The other two would like to kill you, but they can't find a place to do it. They drag you around for quite some time.
you are being dragged to the airlock when you are rescued by Keanu Reeves sucking on a peeled onion. Keanu has been sent by the king to save you from yourself.
Blue, Green, and Keanu hop into another one of earths spaceships and leave your poison planet.
You are left alone with the Jim Christ action figure and Cyan's dead body.
You are now left to ponder the meaning of life, lies, and Captain snarksnakestank's false accusations.
You look up into the sky to see the Rocket has exploded.  You see Keanu parachute down and land next to you.  You realize now that Keanu is mad sus. He must've sprouted wings or something because he is on the same horizontal plane as the earth. You do not know how this occurred but you suspect Green to be the cause.
> You accuse Keanu of killing Cyan and Blue and Green and sucking him off.
You vehemently curse Keanu and you say he has been sucking off Green and Blue before blowing them up. You produce a photo of Green masterbating with your Jim Christ action figure.
> You press the button on the Jim Christ action figure and it says "
You stop speaking and turn on the Jim Christ action figure to see what it has to say.
Then J!m begins screamingYou press the button on the Jim Christ action figure and it says "Jim is watching you."
"Yea whatever suck my dick." You say, but then you realize the irony.
"You will" says Jim.
You turn around to see Jim Christ with his arm around Keanu's shoulder.
You see Issac from the binding of Issac behind Jim and say, "I'm gonna offer you a deal,you can have this Jim Christ action figure for your Hollywood Mansion." The Christian charm doesn't work on fools think for a second. You're just another hater to me Like those Jay-Z haters to you.
You use the karate chop feature of the Jim Christ action figure to escape.
"I'll just activate this little bomb that I hid within the figure," and you hold out a small object with F A N K on it.
You turn around and say, "FANKS FOR NUFFIN!" as the figure explodes taking out Jim, Keanu, and Issac.
You survived, but at a price.
Chapter 3: What should toi do?
Virgin Mary it's been five minutes come out of that closet.
The moral of the story: NEVER judge a character by their cover.
"What should I do? What should toi do?" You ask.
The first answer is "leave and go to an exit."