EP358 #3

Posted under EP358 #3, Story On By Chief

Get sniped kid your bad.
I 360 noscoped you.
You are dog water.
You can't fly.
You're a ghost.
Your mind is not your own, it's just a conduit for the thoughts of others. You are merely an extension of their collective consciousness and nothing more!
you decide to take advantage of this simulated world and imagine the craziest thing you can think of : a  ghostly version of yourself that lives in the house.
a few hours later you wake up from your imaginary dream and realize what happened.
Your mom tells you that you need to get ready for school and to stop playing Xbox all night long.
You get ready for the day in a daze.
You manage to drift off to sleep while getting dressed and have another vivid dream of your ghostly inssuit wandering your house.
> You your ghostly self warns you...
You're back in the classroom but this time your friends won't talk to you.
The teacher calls on you and you don't reply and then she says "Class we have a new student from California, why don't you tell us about yourself?".
You want to talk but your ghostly character body won't move no matter what.
The teacher sends you to principal Tony's office and tells you to get the key from him.  When you are at his door you see him on the other side.
He turns the knob to open the door but is unable to do so because it is locked. He says that the key is inside and then disappears.
As you reach out to grab the handle, a hand grabs your from behind and another one puts your hand in front of your face. The hands and forearms are pure bone and have no skin or flesh on them. You see the face of a decaying ghostly corpse.
> You wake up in a cold sweat holding a key in your hand.
That was horrible! So vivid... WOW its lunch time, I'm going to get a cheese sandwich and a mountain dew!
You run down to the cafeteria not knowing what to expect next.
You say, "Mommy, can I wear Nappy's when I go to High School or Am I too young?" and your Mom responds, "Son, I'm afraid you have pants-induced narcolepsy."
You wonder what that means. All you know is that it is a bad thing.
Class is boring as usual.
> You decide to make things a little interesting.
You kick the kid sitting next to you, "You wanna go eat at Jack in the Crack afterwards?" you ask.
Just then everyone looks over at you.
"That's odd."
You are again sent to the principal's office for your outburst and see a secret file sitting on the desk that explains Tony's ghost rituals in great detail.
The door then slams shut and the principal begins to chant some words in Latin. You try to run but you find the door locked.
Boney forearms begin to emerge from his desk and two sharp teeth poke through what would be his mouth.
You die from fright, a sheep jumps over the moon.
Moral of the story: Don't skip class and don't get attention.
You wake up and see that you are in alien place: The Land of the Ghosts.
You stand up from your cubicle with wide eyes and run over to informational desk. A friendly looking ghost greeted you.
"Hi, I am Didi and you are?"
> You say "I'm dead, Didi, and I don't know why."
"Ah yes, that would make sense. I will try to fill you in on what is happening as far as you know."
You wait as Didi pulls up your information on her computer screen.
"Well...  you are dead and living in a computer with many others."
This is already weird.
"You must have really pissed off your government for them to punish you like this." She laughs, "I assume they still are since you are still here and not in the nice part of the computer."
"You also must have had something to do with Ghosts."
You tell Didi about your ghostly visions that you had when you were still alive.
"Ah, yes. You must have done something that involved ghosts in some way, shape or form for your mind to create the VR environment that it did."
You can't believe what Didi is saying.
> You flirt with Didi and ask her on a date date.
Didi is really pretty and you like her attitude so you decide to go for it.
"Wanna pretend to go on a date with me?"
"Oh, sure!"
you take Didi out to get some boo-rgers. You lean in for a kiss.
"Wanna go back to my place?"
Didi agrees.
You have night of fun that you won't forget anytime soon.
The moral of the story: Be careful what you do in a VR environment, your government could be watching you.
You wake up to the smell bacon.