EP352 #2

Posted under EP352 #2, Story On By Chief

Texting with my Mom.
Don't think that emoji means
What she thinks it does.
"I don't know what you mean by that, I was just texting with my mom." You reply.
> You say "Mom, do you know what the eggplant emoji means?"
You look at your phone and see a picture of an eggplant. Your heart skips a beat when you realize that's what this is all about.
"Oh no! It looks like something bad has happened!"
You head down to The Walrus Club where you see your Mom.  You ask her, "What's the emergency?"
She kisses you. It takes you off guard and you're not quite sure how to respond.
"I'm glad to see you took my advice."
You look around and then you see what the emergency was all about: Red Devil. You see two bars of some kind of chocolate with a Red Devil on the front.
"It looks like somebody's trying to poison you!" Your Mom says.
"Me? But why?"
> You say "You suspect your mother may be trying to poison you. "
"I think it's your mother." You reply.
"Oh, come on. My Mom?"
Your Mom doesn't seem like the type, but you never know. She could have a motive.
> You head into the walrus club and conduct an investigation.
You decide to start by doing a cursory inspection of the bar. There's not too much to investigate, but you notice immediately that there's a pack of cigaretttes tucked behind the bar counter.
The cigarettes have a note attached to them that says:
"Kiss the lung mummy!"
You aren't quite sure what that means, but you think it has something to do with the inhalation madness of respiratory ailments.
You pay the Lung Mummy a visit and inquire about the cigarettes and the red devil.
The lungs tell you that the red devil is in reference to a brand of chocolate.
That makes sense. The red devil is the name of the brand.
"Why was I sent the cigaretttes?"
You say, "The mummy? I bet that Brendan Fraser has something to do with this!"
The lung squirms uncomfortably and begins to choke. The lungs die shortly there after. You never learn why.
After the incident at The Walrus Club, you try to get home as quickly as possible.
> You say "You notice a car following you home. It's your mom. "
You are freaked out by the lung's death, but you get yourself together and begin to make your way home.
There's a car following you. It's a small grey corolla.
You attempt to lose the tail by heading onto a semi frozen lake.
You think you lose them and disembark your wooden shoe. You travel across the lake and then you realize something.
"FUCK! My cell phone is in the shoe!" You say.
> You hear a twig snap in the darkness near you.
You hear a twat and see what you think is an elk. It looks like it might be dying...or undead.
You get close to the Elk to check, but it springs to life and runs directly into a wood chipper.
You see that it is actually a drunk Sam and he's somehow managed to escape the Elk.
You run for your life as a horde of undead wildlife begin to appear from everywhere.
Your mother runs over the horse with her small grey corolla. You see her and scream out in terror.
"I don't blame you for running," she says. "Let's get home!"
> You dive in the car, and your mom peels out.
You run to the car, but realize that the door is locked.
You find yourself standing by the road when a small black man approaches you and says "Do you want a ride little boy?"
You recognize the man is Kevin Hart and you laugh because you are towering over him.  You, your mom, and Kevin Hart fortify the house as the undead horde of forest creatures descends upon your house.
You decide to hide in a closet and the undead horde tears down your front door. The horrors of the night are soon over, but your troubles are just beginning.
The moral of the story: Closets are the place to be.
You have reached the "Cliffhanger" ending.