EP345 #1

Posted under EP345 #1, Story On By Chief

You are a powerful rat named Charles Entertainment Cheese. In 1977 you've established a chain of family restaurants. Recently, however, you've fell out of relevance, now that children don't celebrate their birthdays publicly anymore. Sitting in your mansion with a loaded gun in one hand and a plate of Chuk E. Cheese pizza in the other you contemplate your decisions. You're not sure whether it worth to risk it all on one last radical rebranding or just end it all with a swift pull of a trigger.

Your life is a roller coaster ride full of highs and lows. You have a lot of fun, but also some very dark moments. It's like being in an endless game of musical chairs.
you are watching tv alone one night with a large pizza for one when you see  An advertisement for AIPD's pizzeria. You think about how you could easily get there by yourself, but then you remember that there are several people who would be happy to help you out. So why not?
You go to AIPD's pizzeria to check out the competition that is crushing you.  You notice a list of 10 Unorthodox Pizza Toppings: 1. Squid 2. Bacon 3. Guacamole 4. Pineapple 5. Ham 6. Jalapenos 7. Zucchini 8. Margherita 9. Alfredo 10. Boom! You look down the list twice and choose #3, #6 and #8. The guy behind the counter asks why you don't want cheese on your pizza as it was the greatest invention of mankind.
> You say "My father was killed by the big cheese lobby"
"sounds legit, anything else?"
"Things got a bit weird when I was taken to hospital after this guy burned 50% of my body with a tandour's 3X Chili Madness."
You are inspired by this story to open the fucking first FNAF Pizzeria. You dedicate the shop entirely to large stuffed animals declaring: "This one is for you dad." For the pizza's, you make a mixed concoction of Chuk E. Cheeses's recipes.
You spend the night and notice that the animatronics have sprung to life.  You hide in your office.
"Would it be so hard to replace the security guard? He can't hear shit in that little cupboard."
You gather your thoughts. The animatronics have music playing, but they are not dancing.
you notice all the animatronics staring directly at you. There must be a camera. You quickly find it and destroy it with your laptop. The animatronics keep staring. You notice something even more off: they are all banging against the door to your office.
you make it to 6 AM and all the animatronics sleep for the night. you re-establish communication to the outside world and bring back a tv. You decide to spend your night off watching movies with some new friends.
You decide to watch your favorite movie: Big Trouble In Little Chine 3. The clown from scene 5 even has his own Youtube channel, you have a lot to catch up on.
The moral of the story: stay away from Pizza if you're a fucking cow.