EP321 #2

Posted under EP321 #2, Story On By Chief

It's violence time, enemies all around you, fight for your life, bitch.

You hear a loud noise and look up to see a large rock falling from the sky. You don't know what it is exactly but you assume its some sort of bomb or missile that hit somewhere in the city.
> You say "It's time to get wild!"
"It's time to get wild! Let's go, let's do this!"

The group begins running as fast as they can towards the woods.
you get on with the violence and clothesline the people running behind you. This gives you enough time to get into the large woods
Immediately, the gunshots ring out but you're soon not a target anymore.
You make it to the large woods and enter a large cabin to see. Inside you see a bunch of bodies on the floor, blood stained floors and walls and bullet ridden furniture.
> You hear footsteps and hide underneath a body.
You hide underneath a body, trying to listen what's going on outside. There's more gunshots and yelling but no other sound reaches your ears.
you hear a low roar as the door opens and in walks Smokey the Bear. You've discovered his secret. He doesn't like it when people find him asleep so he wears a heavy boot to muffle the footsteps.
> You wait for Smokey to go to sleep.
You wait patiently for Smokey the Bear to sleep but after a few minutes you realize this might take awhile. You briefly consider waking him up, this can be done in several ways you know.
you crawl out from the pile of bodies and begin to pour kerosene all over the cabin to burn this murderous bear. You then run outside and light the liquid on fire. This will surely wake him up, no bear can withstand the flames.
You have chosen the path of justice this day, wake up Smokey the Bear!
Smokey runs screaming from the cabin and begins to stop, drop, and roll. With all his hair burned off Smokey looks hideous and he locks eyes with you. "YOU DID THIS!" roars Smokey.
You open your mouth to deny the allegations but a well-aimed kick to the side of the head stops you.
> You grab Smokey by the boots.
You grab Smokey by the boots and swing him around like a doll but his weight is far more than you expected. You smash into the wall, breaking several of your bones and knocking you unconscious.
you land next to the pile of bodies and scramble for a weapon. you find a rusty pipe but it looks far too dull to be of any use. You grab the first thing you find which turns out to be a rusty can of bear spray.
You unload the entire can of bear spray right into Smokey's eyes and mouth. You then stand back and smile as the bear begins to scream and empty his lungs. Eventually he goes limp, dead.
You slump to the floor, broken.
> You smoke a cigarette   and wait for the forest service.
You dry heave and crawl outside, coughing up blood. You stumble into the cabin looking for something to help you feel better. You find a pain killer and some antibiotics in a first aid kit.
You open the first aid kit and see that you have pulled a pin on a grenade.  The kit was boobie trapped by Smokey and it explodes in your face. You're blinded, lose your sense of smell, and suffer a serious burn on your face and neck.

You crawl outside and see that it is snowing and begin to smile.
> You realize what you thought was snow is actually ashes.
It takes you a few minutes but you realize that the snowfall is actually ash from the cabin.
You laugh and cough out blood.
The moral of the haiku: You'll get ash in your mouth, but the world still turns.