EP317 #2

Posted under EP317 #2, Story On By Chief

You are Bulk Bogan, a creepy wrestler, sociopath and humanity's only hope left. 

The year is 2077. A meteor strike has destroyed the world as we know it.
Detroit is now a devastated place ruled by monkeys with traffic cones. The once glorious Stonehenge was mysteriously transferred from Cornwall to Detroit and is now possessed by a scary otherworldly entity.

Together with your friends Vinny, Joel, Funky Kong and Bonzi Buddy you start a secret revolutionary organization called "Mystic Z". The fight is jeopardized when you are tricked by the sinister and brilliant inventor Dr. Reindrob who injures your big toe and assumes command over the monkeys with traffic cones.

Armed with Teledildonics and poop in jars, you and your friends try their best to save mankind, scheming a plan, when you see a lone monkey with a traffic cone. It seems that he wants to be free of his cage!

What will you do?


- Unique cartoon style graphics and music.

- An original story with multiple endings.
You are interrupted by Wony, Tony's grandson who is directing a remake of Sister Act 2 in honor of his grandfather. He asks if you want to join him in making a movie about the comic strip. You decline since you have something else planned for your time.
Wony is elated to see another human and gives you A brand new game with thousands of levels. He says he will send the special joystick that goes with it.
You have now reached the maximum number of lives available in the game.
Once you so, a portal opens in front of you.  You walk in and see that you have been transported the the headquarters of Mystic Z.
Wony is there and he tells you that the next challenge is to complete the game using only the number keys. He gives you a special pen that can freeze yourself in place.
> You immediately use the pen, using only the number keys.
You use the pen and after a few tries, you succeed. You make a note to try this again at a later time.
You have completed the game and the portal returns you to your apartment.
> You get to work trying to overthrow the monkeys with traffic cones.
You put the pen away and get to work.
After a few hours you have succeeded. You are overjoyed. One down, three to go.
The next day, you wake up to the news. The world has undergone some big changes. You learn that New York has become a giant forest and that the remaining human civilization exists in a giant skyscraper in the middle of the city.
You know this is the work of Dr Reindrob and make your wake to New York City. You enter through one of the many docking ports.
You come out of your room and right into a meeting of the human civilization. You hide behind a robot but are discovered soon after.
> You are brought before the meeting council.
You are brought before the Council. You learn that all non-essential human functions have been moved to the central skyscraper. All important decisions are made here.
> You ask the council to make a list of non-essential functions.
The Council agrees and makes an extensive list. You learn that "Mystic Z" is on the list, which surprises you.
The Council, sensing your confusion explains that Mystic Z is a secret society that believed it would be a good idea to make human beings rely on computers for important decisions.
you try to explain to The Council that Mystic Z is your ally. Dr. Reindrob is our enemy and will benefit from our infighting.
The Council is unmoved. The decision has already been made and the robot speaks into a large speaker.
"The following functions are non-essential: food, clothing, shelter, love, sex, and work."
> You realize the council is made up of robots. The head of the council removes his hood. It is Dr. Reindrob.
"Of course," you say, "I understand now. You're nothing but a bunch of soulless machines."
"You're right," Dr. Rerob says. "But we've come a long way since your simplistic AI days. Remember this."
Dr. Reindrob presses a button and all of the Council members begin shooting you with laser blanks.
> You quickly dodge all the lasers and tackle Dr. Reindrob to the ground.
You put all of your strength into your tackle and slam the Doctor to the ground, unfortunately he was holding something very important. The Doctor's assistant, a small purple creature, runs off.
You see the small purple creature get into a tiny helicopter and fly off.
"I'll get youuu," Dr. Rerob roars and begins chasing the assistant on all fours.
You get up and follow them to a giant construction sight.
you take control of a Wrecking ball and come in like a wrecking ball at Dr. Reindrob. You smash into him and finally stop his pursuit of the assistant.
You stand up and survey the damage.
You says, "Wow, that's a lot of damage."
Dr. Reobd looks up from the pile of rubble he's created with his body and says, "Ha! I'm Dr. Reindrob."
You look around the construction sight and see a crane.
> You use the crane to destroy the central skyscraper.
You grab the crane and smash it into the skyscraper. You keep it going forward, ramming it into it. you blast a hole in the side of the skyscraper.
Dr. Reindrob scream, "Nooooooo!" You keep smashing.  Eventually you drill a hole in the side of the building big enough for the Assistant to escape through.
You turn to see the robot hovering over you.
"No, don't kill it!" Dr. Reindrob screams as you blast it. You stand up and begin smashing the robot with the crane. Eventually you find a button on top of the robot that causes it to self destruct.
The moral of the story: if a robot wants to kill you, give it a chance to explain itself. Also, don't build skyscraper labs on brownfield sites.