EP 510 – Story #2 – Tommy Wiseau – You are Tommy Wiseau, a misunderstood Genius Filmmaker who has been trying for years to make a film better than your director

Posted under Episode 510, Story On By Chief

You are Tommy Wiseau, a misunderstood Genius Filmmaker who has been trying for years to make a film better than your director
al debut film "The Room".  One day Jason and Tony send you a script for a film about an adult adopting someone older than them.
 You immediately get excited about the idea of directing such a film. Before long you decide to use the production company owned by Jason and Tony. To help your cast in this difficult project, you hire an actor named Vince Vaughn, and then later you find an actress named Juliette Danielle.

Vince Vaughn immediately agrees to star in the project, but has some questions about the legality of a younger person being adopted by an older person.

 After a few phone calls, it's agreed that all the actors involved will be treated as independent contractors under contract, so they have no legal rights as employees or as family members.

You find a pile of expensive birthday presents that Jason threw away:

 a life-sized doll of Marilyn Monroe; a large stuffed animal; and a neon sign reading "Party All The Time."
After a couple of hours of intense debate, the three of you manage to come up with a plan to deal with the situation.

You explain the plot of the movie:

 the boy grows up feeling abandoned and rejected by his father, who was once a famous boxer but had become increasingly depressed because of a brain injury from a boxing match. The boy begins to develop a friendship with the older man and sees him through some of the toughest times in his life, until the two
 eventually end up together romantically. You promise to give each of them their own private moments where they can be on screen together.
With some reluctance, Vincent agrees to be in the film. He also makes a strange request: he asks to play both parts of the older boxer character, and you
Jason is thrilled to work with such a huge star. "You know Vince," he says, "he has been a fan of mine since 'The Outsiders'. I can't believe we are working together!"

You reveal your troubled past to Vince.

"I too struggled with depression as a young man," he tells you. "In my case it was caused by the death of my younger brother at the hands of a bully, a horrible tragedy that haunted me for years."

Vince is moved and asks you if you still remember the bully's name. You tell him your childhood bully was named

Juliette Danielle immediately falls in love with Vince. She has wanted to star in a big budget feature ever since she read about "The Room". After learning that the older boxer will be played by Vince Vaughn, she is even more excited.

Filming is going well until

 Juliette suffers an anxiety attack during one of her scenes. While being filmed by Vincent, she collapses in his arms and starts bawling hysterically.
You reassure Vince and get him to take her home.

Vince agrees to take her home. But the next day, Juliette has locked herself in her home and refuses to film. You go to Juliette's home and ask her what is making her so sad.

"I just can't do this," she cries. "I'm not that kind of girl."
You try to explain that acting is all about pretending to be someone else. "But I can't pretend to be a man," she says.

You make Juliette

 watch some clips from "The Room". When they're over, you tell her that you have seen a lot of actresses who can act convincingly as men.
Juliette takes a few moments to think about your advice.

Juliette calms down and agrees to play a man, but with one condition:

 you must promise that no one will ever find out about her playing a man. You agree and promise to keep it a secret.
You return to work and tell the cast about Juliette's condition.

> You yell "I did not hit her, it’s not true! It’s bullshit! I did not hit her! I did not!"

Your anger is very convincing and makes a great impression on the crew.
You go to Juliette's home and tell her she needs to stop lying about being a man. She denies ever saying any such thing.

You gaslight Juliette until she think she actually IS a man!

When Juliette wakes up, her face is covered with thick, dark stubble. Her body is covered in a thick layer of sweat and she has developed an aggressive new male walk.
"What happened to me?"

You say, "Now your a man!"

 and she cries in relief.
Filming is now going smoothly again.
You spend a few days shooting Vincent's scenes with Vincent.
Jason goes to his friend Vince and tells him he wants to make a deal.
He says, "Look man, we're going to work together for six months, then I'm gonna put my dick inside you and fuck you up the ass for the rest of your life."
Vince is obviously intrigued by this idea.

The movie is released under the name:

"The Outsiders, The Next Generation"
With the help of Vince and Juliette, Jason manages to create a film that people will love.
At the premiere, Jason watches with pride as his movie becomes a huge success.

The moral of the story:

 nothing succeeds like excess.
You have a meeting with your agent.
"This is incredible," says the agent. "The box office receipts from your film are more than I make in an entire year!"