EP 505 – Story #3 – Grebthar the Grebtharian – You are Grebthar the Grebtharian.

Posted under Episode 505, Story On By Chief

You are Grebthar the Grebtharian. You fell in the well. You are now very moist
The year is (Year of the Well), and you are on a quest to save your village from a terrible monster named Gruul who lives in an evil castle. The only way you can get to his castle is by falling down the well.

You follow the hidden tunnel at the bottom of well and approach the evil castle.

Once you see Gruul, you know that you must defeat him before he destroys your village and eats your mom. You run towards the door in the castle and enter, but you realize you forgot to bring a key.

You see Cory from AIPD's incredibly moist clothes on the floor and search through them until you find a moist key.

 You unlock the door and enter the evil castle where you meet Gruul who looks exactly like you.
Grebthar: "Are you Grebthar?"
Gruul: "I am Gruul, the Grebtharian!"

You realize he is your long-lost brother.

Grebthar: "I knew it! We're related!"
Gruul: "You never gave up on finding me even though I didn't want to be found. So I was like, 'Oh, hey, little brother,' and here we are."

You reveal your troubled past to Gruul.

 Your village was destroyed by a terrible monster named Gruul, who was trying to steal your mom. You were sent into a deep well by your father to protect your family.
Grebthar: "I'm really happy to see you.

You open your arms to hug your brother, then stab him in the back. You whisper in his ear, "I'm going to kill you and inherit the family fortune."

 Then you slit his throat with your sharp dagger.
You are now the new ruler of the Grebtharian Empire. You go to the nearest city to collect tribute from the peasants.
One of them says, "Why does the king look just like me?"

You realize this is your long-long lost brother.

Grebthar: "Hi, Cory. I'm Grebthar."
Cory: "It's nice to finally meet you. I've been looking for you since the day I was born."

You give Cory his clothes back, and he hangs them out to dry.

 You ask him to take care of the castle while you are gone.
Grebthar: "What do you mean 'while I'm away'?"
Grebthar's Brother: "You're leaving?"

You tell Cory that you are leaving for your next very important quest:

To find your long-long long lost brother.
You say goodbye to your brother and tell him to keep an eye on the castle while you are away. Then you hop on your trusty horse and set off towards the East.

You head East towards the town of

 the great evil sorcerer, Irdrin the Iron Heart. You enter the village and you find him standing next to the town hall. He is a tall, muscular man with a beard made out of iron.

You tell Irdrin that beard are out of fashion.

He says, "Iron beards? What a ridiculous idea!"
Then he starts to laugh uncontrollably.
He continues to laugh for 20 minutes, then stops to catch his breath.
You continue to tell Irdrin that he has a bad reputation for being a terrible sorcerer who hates
 all living things, but he continues to ignore you.
Suddenly, you hear the villagers screaming from behind the walls of the town. You go to investigate and discover that the village is in shambles because of some huge monsters.

Your realize the monsters are dragons.

You look at the castle where Irdrin resides and see that it is guarded by a big, terrifying dragon.
Irdrin: "Oh, I see! I guess I'll just have to kill them all!"

You notice the head dragon looks exactly like you and say, "BROTHER!!!!!!!!!!!"

You jump off your horse and run towards the castle, but Irdrin shoots fireballs at you.
The fireballs are very moist and will melt your flesh.
You run into the woods and find a treehouse in the forest.

You dump tons of silica gel on Irdrin, drying him out. He will moisten no more.

Irdrin: "What are you doing? You can't defeat me."
Grebthar: "You're my brother, aren't you? We were raised together!"
Irdrin: "But I'm also the head dragon!

You watch as Irdrin shrivels into a dragon raisin.

 Then, you break his neck and rip out his heart.
You throw the heart down to the ground and stomp on it. The ground becomes covered in an enormous hole that swallows up both dragons.

The moral of the story:

 you shouldn't make fun of people's beards.
The end.