EP 481 – Story #2 – You are Officer Huckinson. you smelt it, but you did not dealt it. nobody will believe that you are not the one that farted.

You are Officer Huckinson. you smelt it, but you did not dealt it. nobody will believe that you are not the one that farted. Your captain just demanded your gun and your badge.
There is no way to escape from this situation. You can only resign yourself to serve out the rest of your days as an officer in His Majesty's Royal Marine Corps. The least they could do would be to grant you a pension or at least some compensation for being falsely accused of such heinous
 crimes.
What were you thinking when you told them that? How much of what you said was true? Was any of it really worth throwing away your life over? You had better think long and hard about these things, because there is absolutely nothing anyone can do to save you now.
You are framed when your captain discovers fart killing bullets in the gun you just turned in.
 He has decided to use their discovery against you by accusing you of committing murder.
Your captain says "The next person I see with those guns is going to be court-martialled." When you protest, saying that the ammunition was planted on purpose by his enemy, he silences you.
You pull down the captain's pants to reveal a large brown streak in their underwear. You gasp and accusingly say "What's this?"
Your captain tells you to shut up and stop pestering him while he pulls out a similar stain from under his shirt. He shows both stains to the officers around him. "Look," he says triumphantly, "these aren't farts!
You hand your Captain a picture of Jason shaking his fist at you as you know you have caught him brown handed.
 The picture goes into the safe, along with all of the evidence and testimony.
You tell him you have found the real murderer but that the captain wants to stay alive so you will keep quiet about it.
Your captain smirks, but he knows he has been bested and rehires you to the force.  The next day you receive a summons to Colon Court.
There you face two charges: 1) murder in the first degree; 2) impersonating a British officer without authority.
The case begins. It seems that you have been seen leaving the scene of a crime wearing a military uniform, which is considered enough evidence for the prosecution.
You realize it was all a setup, and in a moment of desperation you ask the judge to force the captain to drop his pants and reveal the shit streak within.
After the verdict comes back guilty on both counts, the judge sentences you to death.
However, you are saved by the arrival of three marines who storm the courtroom, shouting "Hoorah!"
The marines take you to their secret headquarters and the head marine tells you that he works for
 the government t
w
o. He also introduces you to your superior, the Secretary of Defense, whom you had mistaken for a clown earlier.
When the head marine leaves to report to his superiors, you learn that the Marines have taken over the country and intend to install democracy once again.
Government Two is looking to establish the following new radical laws

 about farting:
1) All citizens must wear special poop-proof clothing at all times.
2) Toilets and sewers will be equipped with sensors which alert the police if people leave them.
3) Anyone discovered holding a package of farting powder will be shot on sight.
The want you to lead the movement and you agree under the condition that you can add your own fart law:
4) Any adult citizen caught trying to pass off a fake fart as reality must immediately surrender his voting rights and turn himself in to the nearest Police station.
***
The Secret Underground Government Headquarters (Underground Tunnel)
This place used to be an abandoned warehouse.


	
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