You are Ranger Conner, a park ranger who has heard about a littering problem going on at the park. However, the litter isn't on the ground. It's in the river. The river is filled with Sister Act 2 VHS tapes. You have never seen so many VHS tapes in a lake in your entire life. You suspect that this is a prank from Tony from AIPD. The park superintendent wants you to go and get rid of these tapes. He says they're probably fake, but he needs them gone. So you head downriver to the place where the tape was found. You notice a note attached to one of the VHS tapes, it says: "This is the real thing. I'm not lying." But you know there's no way any sane person would throw away a VHS tape. And besides, you've seen some strange things in the park already today : -- There's an invisible man wandering around in the woods. -- Someone left a shoe in the middle of the road. -- Someone dropped a baby doll by the side of the road. It could be anything! So you decide to investigate further. You follow the path into the forest and come across the footprints of a woman wearing high heels. The trail leads up a hill and ends at a clearing. You reach the clearing and lose track of the woman, but you uncover an stockpile of Boss Baby DVDs along with a Boss Baby float from the Macy's Day Parade. You also find a dead bird with a cell phone glued to its leg. "I guess whoever did this doesn't want anyone finding out about their little game," you say aloud. Then you hear a voice coming from inside the bird's cage. "That's right!" It says. "We've been watching you for a long time now. We're gonna make sure you can't escape." You look through the bars of the birdcage and see a pair of eyes staring back at you. You fall backwards on to a 10-foot pile of clothes belonging to Cory. "What are you doing?" Cory asks. "Cory," you say. "I think I've just found the culprit behind all of this." Cory looks around, puzzled. You accuse Cory and ask, "Why Cory?" "Because I don't know how those tapes got here, but someone must have put them in my locker before I arrived. This is obviously a setup to frame me for littering." You then tell him what happened when you first saw the notes. You double down and begin to grill Cory. "And you still insist that you didn't do it? You didn't take the tapes or the DVD box set?" "Yes! Why would I litter? I'm a vegan." You try to question him again, but he cuts you off. Suddenly, the bird phone begins to ring. You pick it up and answer it. "Hello?" A voice answers, "Hi! Is this the place where you found the DVDs?" "Yeah..." "Can you please bring them over here?" You say "Where's here?" "The zoo!" "But I thought you said they were fake?" "They are. Bring them here and we'll destroy them together." You hang up the phone and start walking towards the door. You arrive at the Zoo with a garbage truck filled with Boss Baby and Sister Act 2 DVDs. "Is this everything?" The woman asks. "Yes," you reply. She throws the DVDs into the back of the truck. "Thank you," she says. You watch as the truck drives away. You recognize the woman as she drives away, it is none other than Susan! You run after her car, but it disappears into thin air. You run around looking for the car, but it's nowhere to be found. You walk around the parking lot and spot a small white van parked next to a dumpster.
EP 450 – Story #3 – You are Ranger Conner, a park ranger who has heard about a littering problem going on at the park.
Posted under Episode 450, Story On By Chief