EP 437 – Story #2

Posted under Episode 437, Story On By Chief

You are Zug Yogshimeshi, a modern settler. You have just founded the country of Timbukthree and must now write its constitution. You begin with the following five unorthodox laws:

1) A man may not marry his mother or father.
2) The state shall not allow slavery.
3) The state shall provide free medical care for all citizens.
4) No one may be forced to serve in the military.

5) All children are entitled to an equal education.
Your government is struggling to come into being. How will you balance these new laws? Will you find it impossible to implement any of them?

A gathering of protesters are outside your house with signs that say "Let me marry my Dad"
 and "I need money." They're angry because they believe that the first law you wrote is discriminatory.
How do you respond to this claim?
"It's true!" said Zug, unable to contain her excitement.

You pay for your country wide healthcare with Jason from AIPD's credit cards.
 He'd been working on a program that would let him run them directly through the AIs' systems but hadn't managed to finish it yet.
"But I can prove it," she continued.
 She was so excited she could barely speak.
She reached over and grabbed the pad of paper from beside the computer. She tapped a few keys and then held up the screen. It showed a page of text, which she read aloud:
"The people who live here are called Timbukt
os. They have long, black hair and pale skin. They are very intelligent and their culture is advanced. They use a lot of technology, including robots. Their most important invention is a machine that allows them to travel between the stars.

You hack into robot control center and order the robots to
 destroy themselves. You then order the Timbuktos to stop using the robots. You also make sure the robots are destroyed before the Timbuktos discover what you've done.
"Now, Timbuktos are a race of bipedal humanoids with two arms and
 two legs. They are physically similar to humans, although their bodies are slightly smaller and more slender. They are intelligent and technologically advanced.
"Timbukto males have large noses, small eyes, and thin lips.
 Their ears are pointed and they tend to wear hats made out of leaves.
"Timbuktos females have big noses, big eyes, and thick lips. They have broad shoulders and wear clothes made from animal hides.

You organize a town hall and tell the people of Timbukthree, "Jason has all his moony in Cryptocurrencies, so his Credit cards are worthless!"

"The people of Timbukthree don't believe you. But you're right! Jason's credit cards are worthless. I'm sorry!"
"The people of Timbukthree riot.

You approve the deployment of the TImbukthree national guard to quell the riots.

"The people of Timbukthree demand the freedom to marry whoever they want.
You sign a bill allowing same-sex marriage.
"The people of Timbukthree are not satisfied.

You use technology to cover the town in a Human Remains Tornado.

"The people of Timbukthree are still not satisfied.
You take away their jobs and force them to work at a soup kitchen.
"The people of Timbukthree are still not satisfied.

You put them in internment camps.
"The people of Timbukthree are still not satisfied.
You execute them.
"The people of Timbukthree are now satisfied.

You decide to plan the death of Timbukto's on
 a whim.
"Timbukto is a planet of humans who have achieved spaceflight. They are a peaceful species that values intelligence and scientific advancement.

 They are a great civilization that deserves to live.
"You decide to kill them all.
"Timbukto is a peaceful planet. You are a racist pig.
"Timbukto is a peaceful planet.
 You are a murderer.
"Timbukto is a peaceful planet. You are a monster.
"Timbukto is a peaceful planet. You are a bigot.

You realize you have become everything you once despised.

Next time on "Red Planet":
 What happens when you murder a whole planet of innocent people?
"Yes!" said Zug. "It's true!"
"It is?" asked Jason.
"Oh yes.
 I hacked into the Timbukto's AI and ordered it to destroy itself. Then I ordered the Timbuktos to stop using the robots. And I made sure the robots were destroyed before the Timbuktos discovered what I'd done."