EP 422 – Story #1

Posted under Episode 422, Story On By Chief

You are a ghost named Brenda. Unfortunately, nobody seems to be scared of you. You decide to seek out spectral surgery for bigger boo-bies.
 Your family and friends may have forgotten about your existence, but the universe hasn't. It's still got plenty of ghosts that need saving from themselves. And so do you.
The dead aren't just waiting around for their final judgment or whatever.

You visit a ghost plastic surgeon. Dr. Ghastly McGruber.
 He has his own practice in Hollywood. But he also moonlights as an expert on the supernatural. So it shouldn't surprise you when he greets you at his door with a question: "Are you looking for work?"

You notice across the hall is DR Nick, the incompetent Doctor of Springfield that will give you a Boo-bie job for way cheaper.  But you decide to stay with Dr McGruber when you see Dr Nick shove Cory's clothes which are drenched in raw sewage in a woman's chest.
 The poor soul screams like she was being murdered by some kind of monster. She dies before you can ask what happened.
"She wasn't ready," says Dr. Ghastly. "It happens all the time."

Dr. Ghastly McGruber goes into one of his operating rooms and removes a groin bandage from a ghostly Adonis, and reveals the ghosts new CBT wand grafted on to his ghostly form.
 It allows him to operate without killing anyone. With this tool, he will perform your operation. You leave his office with the wand, excited to finally get your big break as a ghostbuster.
Cory's father tells you to meet them at the cemetery.

You arrive at the graveyard and notice Cory's father is standing near a grave that says:

In loving memory of Henry W. Jackson
Served in the U.S. Army during World War I
Died April 14th, 1919
Of influenza complications
Cory's mother arrives shortly after.

Cory's mother brought a full picnic basket filled with the following haunted food items:

Fresh fruit (peaches, apples, grapes)
Pretzels
Nuts
Raisins
Bread sticks
Potato chips
Popcorn
Chocolate bars
Strawberries
Honey
Jam
And her husband brings a bottle of wine.

Cory's parents start with haunted raisins.
 They then eat the pretzel.
Your family is very hungry, so you start eating the nuts.
The wine starts making you feel warm and fuzzy inside.
You keep eating the chocolate bars.

Your cemetery picnic with Cory's parents is interrupted by Sans Undertale, the skeleton.

He wants you to help him kill Cory.
"I'm not helping you," you say.
"Don't worry, we'll find someone else to take care of it," says Cory's father.

You rush off, your bosums heaving, as you run to warn Cory. You arrive at his underpass apartment, Sans in tow, just as Cory says " Hey YouTube, welcome to another muckbang!"

"Hey, hey! Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your show," you say.
"Oh no, come on in," says Cory. "I was about to end my video, anyway."

You see Cory is about to take his last bite of food when notice a pair of his pants covered raw sewage hidden in the last chicken nugget.  You slap the fork out of his hands and save his life!  You tell Cory, "It was poisoned by your parents Cory!!!"

"What?!?!"
"They wanted me to kill you," you say.
"No way! That's insane!"
"That's what I said, too," you say.
"Well, thanks for saving my life," says Cory.

Next time on "Big Titty Ghosties Saved Me From A Poison Mukbang":

You head over to Cory's house.
"Hey Cory, I think you're in danger," you say.
"Oh, really? What makes you say that?"
"Your parents tried to poison you."