EP 379 – Story #3

Posted under Episode 379, Story On By Chief

Behold the spag bowl
Let me drown my sorrows now
In tomato sauce and spaghetti
We're all in this together
And so are you
The spag bowl
Soup for a rainy day
When there's nothing to eat
I'll try my best with spaghetti
If I can't make it, I'll just drink tomato juice
You're not too far behind
Spaghetti's really good
Don't be ashamed
Just give it a try

You say, "Whenever I have spag bowl, I poop my pants."
So that's why.
I'd like to apologize to everyone who's ever eaten spaghetti with me.
You make a list of dinner guests that you would like to make amends with for the atrocities that took place in your underwear when they were over.  You cater a large trough of spaghetti from Olive Garden.  The people at Olive Garden want to get their hands on the recipe.  So they bring you some Spag Bowls.  Now you've got two problems.
You cannot resist the Spag Bols and close you eyes to begin the overconsumption your own shame be damned.  Just as all your guests arrive, you feel the rumble in your stomach and begin to cry for you know what hell is about to go down.  The people at Olive Garden are ecstatic.  They'll share the recipe with everyone.  They will even buy a few thousand bottles of Spag Bowls.
You say, "We can have dessert, while watching AIPD. I really missed Jason, Tony, Cory and Jim. I love those guys."
Your friends tell you that you're crazy and that you should just eat the spaghetti.
You look confused, but you pick up a fork and begin to eat.  You think that you must be missing something.  But then you realize that the Spag Bowls are very good.  You do not want to stop.
You wake up the next day covered in Spag and put yourself into a rehab clinic.  You take an Adderall and end up drinking them.  It's hard to remember why you started doing that.
You make a friend in rehab and his name is Eric.  He says he feels like he's been reborn.  You tell him about your life.  He says, "I don't want to hear it.  Just forget it."
He also tells you that you have a lot of work ahead of you.
The moral of the story: