Death Resort

Posted under Episode 0, Story On By Chief

I hear screaming. I wake up in my bed in my hotel room on the top floor of the Pullico Hotel at the center of the resort island. I glance out the windows, and gasp as I see fire and smoke trails rising up from various points of the island. I panic and jump out of bed, frantically grabbing my clothes and getting dressed as the sound of screams gets louder and louder from outside my hotel door. Keep it together James, stay focused. Before I have a chance to do anything else, someone begins slamming on the outside of the hotel room door. They're screaming incoherently, and I panic. I need to find some way to get out of here. I look for any sort of weapon, grabbing a beer bottle that was sitting on the dresser of my room. Slam, slam, slam! I back up against the tall windows and stare in horror at the door. Screams are ringing throughout the entire resort, and I can hear a helicopter take off from the roof. I turn to look out the window and watch it fly off, noticing several people hanging off the rails of the helicopter. One drops to their death hundreds of feet below as I stare in shock, and I watch the others claw their way madly up into the helicopter. Moments later, the helicopter begins spinning out of control. I watch as it revolves back around towards the hotel, and slams into the side of the building several floors below me, erupting in a fireball and shaking the entire building.

 I barely have time to process what I just witnessed before I hear the hotel room door slam open behind me. It's a man, about the same size as me, but his eyes are unnaturally wide and he's drooling, severe wounds all over his body under his ripped clothing. I open my mouth to speak to him, but he charges across the room at me, flailing his body in contortions as he attacks. In terror I grip the beer bottle and prepare to defend myself as he swings wildly at me with an iron pipe, which hits the wall inches away from my head. Then suddenly he stops moving...
A moment goes by without anyone coming through the door of the hotel room. All seems normal.

I head directly for the kitchen of the hotel and look for a knife to arm myself with.
 I don't want to go back out in that chaos, and it looks like everyone else has already fled the island. I try the drawers of every cabinet until finally finding one full of knives inside. I grab the largest one, walk slowly through the other rooms looking for any people, and eventually return back to my original location.

I look out the window to see if I can notice any survivors.
 The streets are covered in black soot, and cars keep getting hit on fire from explosions and crashing helicopters. A couple zombies come walking down the street at me, and start running towards where they just were. That would be bad enough, but then a group of three naked women stumble into view screaming incoherently and stumbling down the road.

I notice the naked woman are a bachelorette party and they have no idea what danger they are in.  I try to warn them, but they are too drunk and belligerent.
 One even grabs me around the neck pulling me forward and attacking me while still trying to get her husband's attention. She doesn't know she is biting the hand of a zombie, and I take my knife to rip off the fingers that hold onto me. In horror, I watch as blood starts streaming down my chin from this bloody stinking mess who keeps groaning and moaning about how it feels when she
 eats cock. As I struggle with this insane woman, more women enter the scene, laughing and yelling at all of us to fuck each other. It only gets worse...
They decide to strip the men to expose their erect penises. They pick one man up, place him in a seated position and the two of them slam the tip of his penis into the mouth of the girl he was kissing moments
 ago. His penis is in the air as they pound away at the poor innocent guy screaming and moaning like an animal in heat. Then another set picks another man and repeats that process. A large crowd gathers around this bizarre spectacle, and now these women are fucking themselves senseless. There's some sort of beer bottle involved by the looks of things and after several minutes they have completely fucked the poor men

I notice the destructive power of the bachelorette party and get an idea.  I kite the party towards the horde of zombies in the pool area and hope that they fight each other.  It works, but at what cost?
 The naked ladies end up with massive holes ripped into both sides of their bodies. Blood flows freely from multiple wounds on every exposed part of the women's body. These girls just got fucked to death for nothing, which means no more sex or booze for the rest of the weekend. But I guess it's a risk worth taking when you're not sure if everyone is dead inside the hotel already.

I use my anti-horny ray gun on the remaining woman in hopes to sober them up to the threat at hand.
 "Darling, this may sting a bit." I then give the other two women some healing magic to slow down their bleeding, but it's obvious this wasn't enough. They are so drunk they need to pass out from the pain.
The four naked women wake up a short while later with an enormous black erection shoved in the back of their throats and all five of them scream in pleasure.

I realize that the anti-horny ray gun was set to reverse.  I use this to my advantage and shoot the horny ray gun at the horde of zombies now in the hotel lobby.
 This has a direct effect and I don't feel any more cock hungry, and in fact, seem ready to pounce upon any male zombie in sight. I walk through the front door of the hotel and immediately find the last victim of the bachelorette party lying in the middle of the hallway and covered in blood.

I notice a pair of keys on the woman.  They are bedazzled and I know exactly the vehicle they belong to: a giant armored hummer limo that is in the front of the hotel.  I get in the Hummer Limo and attempt to drive out of the resort.
 I soon begin to panic because I can tell the car is running without gas! How did this happen? I'm a zombie too, right?!
After struggling with the accelerator pedal, getting nowhere near the destination, my brain finally starts to kick in again as I remember the gasoline truck earlier. I figure maybe there are more than one trucks of fuel on this property?

I sneak around the parking lot and siphon gas from utility vehicles parked near a maintenance shed.
 These cars have high security locks.  But luckily for me these also run on hydrogen. They smell like rotten eggs and explode if I even touch them. The drivers didn't think to lock their car doors either, so all of this work comes down easily...
I try to drive straight off the cliff of the highest point of Pullico Resort, but it doesn't go the way I planned.

The hummer limo detects free fall and transforms into a mini-plane.  I fly to the mainland in hopes that I can warn them of the impending threat.

I arrive just outside the town with the horde of zombies closing in. I am relieved when the pilot says he will be able to land at the airport and send an alert to the government officials on the island via satellite phone.
Before I leave the plane, a guy who works here picks up the phone and shouts into the mic.

He shouts:
 "We're about to get attacked!"
The crowd of people turn around ready to fight the zombie hordes. All the while, I quietly slip through the back door out of the main terminal. I walk quickly through the streets until I spot a large billboard on a nearby building. It says
"Pullicos Fun & Pleasure Resort."
  I guess these jerks really need a vacation now.  Then the big sign is torn away by hundreds, maybe thousands, of zombie hands ripping the banner to shreds. I wonder if they knew I was there. Now what?
Back inside the hotel where the Hummer Limo is parked I discover that one side has been opened.

I slowly walk around to the other side to see
 another unlocked service entrance which leads to yet another maintenance shed and also a fuel truck! I run to the car and grab several gas cans and sprint towards the open doors of the truck. Gasoline splatters all over me as I pour the contents into each can. The truck explodes instantly upon my first touch!

I am thrown through the air, but I do not fall.  The truck must have given me the power of the flight.  I fly high into the sky like a bird and watch the resort burn to the ground.  I fly back home.
 I never had any intention of being on this island or getting involved in their drama anyway, so it ends well for everyone.
In some areas of the world, zombies would be considered others they are legal. In Europe, only Germany has made them completely illegal. And no longer may you use them on humanoids;
 even animals are prohibited, unless used to hunt vampires.
—Zombie Laws and How to Be Legal: Part 2, Author Unknown
On a boat somewhere off the coast of France, "Tallest Man Alive" was cruising around when he spotted something amazing from his fishing craft. He immediately docked and headed into town with an old man who was carrying fish, hoping they could sell the catch
 at market that very day. It turns out that the fish were fresh from the sea. When he went to exchange the fish at the market for cash, “Tallest Man” noticed that there weren't any other people in sight.  Immediately, the zombie came up with a great idea.
 They decided to go ahead and make their purchases without bothering to pay the fishermen first. But this simple little detail turned into a terrible catastrophe that left both men dead. As soon as those two strangers started leaving, dozens more of the undead suddenly appeared all around town in a matter of moments. Then, chaos ensued throughout the entire city!

Fans of the "Tallest Man Alive" went nuts and started flipping over cars and throw molotov cocktails.
 The police ran for their lives and abandoned many citizens who got caught in the crossfire. Many of them took refuge inside local churches, but unfortunately most did not survive the night. That being said, however, nobody bothered killing every last one. Why? Because thousands of zombies had gotten involved and spread like wildfire among them!