Daniel Monkey, a monkey in the Bronx Zoo

Posted under Episode 124, Story On By Chief

You are much smarter than the other monkeys in the exhibit. You feel that you do not belong with such unsophisticated creatures. You have big dreams far beyond eating bugs and flinging poo. You dream of escaping the Zoo and living among the high society socialites of New York City. You begin to plan your escape.

One day, while you are playing with some of the other monkeys, they tell you that there has been an accident at the zoo. A gorilla named Harambe was killed when he fell into a moat. The rest of the gorillas have become upset about this death and they are now attacking each other. They seem intent on killing each other before anyone else gets hurt.

You persuade one of the angry gorillas to bend the bars on your cage so you can escape. You bribe him with a banana you have been saving.

"I'm sorry, I don't have any money". He says as he pulls out his wallet. "But if you let me out of here, I promise I will give you something good". He takes your hand and leads you through the cages until you reach the gate. He opens it for you and then turns around and heads back inside the enclosure.

He turns around and says "Be careful, it's a dangerous place out their. The humans call it a concrete jungle, where dreams are made of."

> You go Back Inside the Cage You turn around and head back into the cage. You hear the sounds of fighting outside. It seems like everyone wants to get in the cage too. It would be best if you just stayed out of it. You walk over to a small railing that goes up to a second floor window.

You work up your courage and leave the cage. You walk out of the enclosure and hop on the next bus that is going to Manhattan.

You're very excited about your new found freedom. Suddenly, the bus stops and all the passengers look down at you. One of them yells "GET OUT OF THE ROOM YOU LITTLE BASTARD!" Another passenger grabs you by the arm and runs off. You quickly run after him but he isn't fast enough.

You rip his arms off and take a poop on his head.

Then you jump onto another moving vehicle and drive away from the city. On the way home, you see a man in a business suit standing in front of a building. He waves to you and tells you to come with him. You follow him into a large office area. There are several people sitting around a table talking.

You are mistaken by the businessmen at the meeting. They all think you are the CEO of their stock trading company. You go along with it and confidently begin to tell them how to run their business.

The CEO tells you to stop being an idiot and explains to you what the world really needs. He tells you that you need to start investing in real estate because it is going to be worth more than ever before. Suddenly, the door to the room opens up and a tall blonde woman wearing glasses walks in. She looks at you and smiles.

You look at the beautiful blonde woman and get a tiny monkey erection. The other businessman are impressed with your power move. The blonde woman begins to give her powerpoint presentation.

She starts off by saying she got tired of waiting for the economy to improve. So she decided to buy a bunch of worthless stocks to make some quick cash. Unfortunately, she didn't realize that the market had already crashed twice and most of these stocks were worthless. So she bought a few companies that were still trading at a loss. Then she sold those companies for a profit.

You start banging the table. The other CEOs in the room follow your lead and start doing the same. The woman says she'll be able to pay you all back... with interest! The room erupts into chaos with people hugging and chanting.

Suddenly, the door slams shut and locks behind you.

You see the CFO of the company open up his briefcase. Inside his briefcase is a bunch of cocaine. He takes it out and everyone starts doing cocaine off the the big glass business table. You feel good inside, like you have finally achieved your dream.