AIPD EP178 – 9/13/2020 – Story 3

Posted under AIPD EP178 - 9/13/2020 - Story 3, Story On By Chief

You are Dan, and you only eat food that's in cans. One day you find a note in a can. It reads, "Come down to the Copacabana." You take the note and a backpack full of cans down to the Copacabana.

Q. What happens when you get there?
A. You get on the plane that takes you far, far away.
Q. What do you find when you land?
A. A brand new shiny penny.
Q. What does this mean?
A. You are the last man on earth.
Q.  What happened to everyone.  A.  A nuclear weapon was denoted.
Q. Where were you when it happened?
A. In a cave. You didn't even know the world had ended until you went outside and saw trees growing through the middle of your house.
Q.
> You q. How do you know you are the last man on earth. A. Nobody is on social media.
Q. What is it about social media that draws you to it. A. It connects you to humanity, even if it is only virtual humanity.
Q. Why does the tree in your backyard grow through your house.
A. Because it is the shortest path to the sun.
Q. What does this mean. A. You don't know.
Q.
Q. Where the women at? A. At da club. Q. What club? A. The c-l-u-b. Q. ?
Q. Why are they at the club.
A. To meet men, duh! Q.
What happens when the last man on earth visits a club full of women?  A. Everyone gets lucky.
Q. Is this really true, or did you just make it up? A. Why would I make something like that up?
Q.
Q. How would I know?  A.  Because you are always making stuff up.  Q.  Do you want the women or not? A. Yes!
Q. Do you go over and talk to the women at the club? A. Yes.
Q. What is happening right now? A. I am dancing with the women at the club.
Q. Why does Q the Star Trek villain ask all these questions. A. Because he sees all and knows all. '
Q. What does that mean? A. Shut up, Q!
Q. Tell me what you want to ask the most. A. Why is there no rim text?
Q.
Q. What is the meaning of the universe? A. Actually, this is pretty interesting....
Q. Who is Q? A. Shut up, Q!
Q. Is Trelane a Star Trek character? A. No, he's a Dr.
Q. What is he a doctor of. A. Your mom.
Q. What's a mom. A. Shut up, Q!
Q. What are these jokes about moms and dads? A. They are making fun of the fact that you have no parents.
Q.  Where are my parents?  A.  Everyone died in the blast.  Q.  Should we get on the dance floor? A. Sure, let's get on the dance floor!
Q. Am I going to die like everyone else? A. Got me...
Q. What is the meaning of life? A. Actually, this is pretty interesting....
Q. Who created the universe? A. You did.
Q. What happened before the beginning? A. Nothing.
Q. Will it ever end? A.
Q. I repeat, will the universe end? A. It ends, then it begins again. 1.Q. NO! I mean, will it end someday? A. Of course.
Q. What is the meaning of life? A. Actually, this is pretty interesting....
Q.
What is your favorite feud?  A. Star Trek vs. Star Wars vs. Doctor Who vs. Firefly vs. The Hunger Games vs. Ghostbusters vs. Pokemon vs. Calvinball (you can only pick one!)
A: Calvinball!
Q.
What is your favorite fruit? A. Apple
Q. Does this mean something? A. Maybe.
Q. Is there a reason for these questions? A. Of course!
Q. What is the meaning of life? A.
> You say "A. I don't know.  Q.  What is inside Area 51?"
A. It depends on who you ask.
Q. What is the meaning of life? A. Actually, this is pretty interesting....
Q. Who created the universe? A. You did.
Q.
Suddenly a lone survivor runs into the Supermarket where he sees you on the ground playing with a Quaker Oats container and a very rotten apple. "What is the meaning of life?" he asks.
A. If you can find the new question, you might be able to get out of this terrible place.
Q. What is the question? A.
Q. Is the new question the old answer? A. We are all connected although we fight to separate. 
Q. What is the question? A.
Q. Are we alone in the universe? A. No, we are not alone, but we are the only ones who count. 
Q.
The lone survivor says, "Cool man, cool." He sits down beside you and joins in the play. Soon another person joins in the game and then another and soon they are all playing the game and having fun.