AIPD EP177 – 9/12/2020 – Story 1

You Walter Dock, are a guy who is about to go on a blind date. You are told that your date has a good sense of humor. Because of this, you decide to meet your date at the mall while wearing a used diaper. When your date approaches you, you start dancing, while saying, "Look at me: I'm a grown-man dancing around in a dirty diaper." Instead of laughing, your date looks concerned. She says, "I think you have me confused with someone else," and walks away.

Game over.
> You chase after the date, and you ask her to help you buy you a new outfit.
You chase after the date, and you ask her to help you buy you a new outfit.
You decide to tell a joke to break the ice. "Why is a goose like a balloon?" You ask. "Because they're both filled with gas!" You answer. Your date looks unimpressed. "I think I have you confused with someone else,"
> You realize that this isn't your date. You're supposed to be on a date with Samantha, your date's identical twin sister.
You realize that this isn't your date. You're supposed to be on a date with Samantha, your date's identical twin sister.
> You say "Your breasts look lovely tonight. "
You say "Your breasts look lovely tonight."
Your date blushes and smiles. "Thank you!" She says.
> You continue to compliment her tits.
You continue to compliment her tits.
"Your mustache looks lovely tonight," you say.
"Why thank you," she says, "I grew it myself."
> You say "Can you get me a clean diaper?"
You say "Can you get me a clean diaper?"
"Of course, sir," she says. "I'll be right back." She gets up and goes to the bathroom.
> You see another woman enter the mall and she look identical to your date.
You see another woman enter the mall and she look identical to your date.
> You say "Hello, Ramantha. You must be Samantha's third identical sister."
You say "Hello, Ramantha. You must be Samantha's third identical sister.
You realize you are having a severe case of deja vu. "I've been here before," you say.
"No, you haven't," says the woman who you now know is named Ramantha. "You've never met me before.
> You compliment her breasts.
You compliment her breasts.
"Why, thank you," she says, "But they aren't as big as my sister's."
The end.
> You say "I don't believe you. Show me your breast so that I may see for myself."
You say "I don't believe you. Show me your breast so that I may see for myself."
"No!" She says, "Why do want to see them so badly?
> You say "Well the you maam are a liar, if you can't prove it, you are fibbin"
You say "Well the you maam are a liar, if you can't prove it, you are fibbin"
While you are talking to Ramantha, Samantha returns with the clean diaper. "What are you doing with my sister?" she says.
"What does it look like I'm doing?" you say.
"It looks like you're flirting with my sister," Sam says.
> You say "Comparing breast size is technically not flirting, or is it?"
You say "Comparing breast size is technically not flirting, or is it?"
Samantha grabs the dirty diaper from you and begins wiping off your face with it.
You have Samantha arrested by Mall Security, you tell the mall cop you are pressing charges.
"What are the charges?" The mall cop asks.
> You say "Manslaughter"
You say "Manslaughter"
The Mall cop looks shocked. "You can't charge her with manslaughter fordiying someone with a dirty diaper! You must have something stronger than that."
You replay, "Assault with a deadly weapon.  Assault and spattering in this case."
The Mall cop goes over to talk to your date. "Listen lady, you'd better get yourself a good lawyer because the guy you were with wants to charge you with something called assault with a deadly weapon.