You are Bob. You are a plumber. You are working underneath a sink when you hit your head and say... At the end of the work day, you should... You go to a baseball game with your son. Unfortunately, it's one of those rare times when you don't know that much about the rules of the game. You look like an idiot when the home team... ...turns to you and tells you to learn the rules. Which is more annoying? ...apparently knows you. You go to a birthday party for your nephew, and when the clown comes in, the kids... ...into a tree (which breaks your fall). > You wake up in a stupor. You don't know what happened. You have a concussion and can't remember what happened. The police come in and interrogate you, your wife, and your kids. You tell your family to say nothing and call your lawyer Johnny Cochrane. He helps you avoid criminal charges. You sue the city for failing to trim back the tree, which has been classified as a hazard. > You go find the clown at the party and ask him what happened to you. You find your clown and ask him what happened to you. He admits that he stumbled and accidentally pushed you. "I'm so sorry," he tells you. "It was an accident." You feel the back of your head and notice a giant bandage covering your head wound. You interrogate the tree next. "You had no right to trip me," you say, poking the tree several times. The tree says nothing and just sits there. The police arrest you for assaulting a city employee and put you in jail. > You while in your prison cell you use your plumbing knowledge to rig the toilet and flood the jail. You use your knowledge of the city's sewage system to turn on the water in your cell and flood the entire station. The guards quickly rush out of the cells to avoid getting wet. You sneak outside and, using a change of clothes hidden in the cell before you flooded it, escape the police station. > You call your brothers, Mario and Luigi, to help you go into hiding. Your brothers help you escape to a cabin in the woods, where you stay for several weeks. They bring you food, and you live off the land. You ask them if they have seen anything on the News about you. "No," your brother says. "You're pretty safe, it seems. Nobody misses you." You nod. > You shed a single tear. "I am sorry about this," you say. You drive to a strip club and use the last of your money to rent a private room with two strippers. You spend the entire day with them and have a good time. You then go to your brother's house. Your happy ending. > You explore the woods by your brother's house and find a castle. There is a toad man inside the castle. He says... You enter the woods by your brother's house and find a castle. There is a toad man inside the castle. He says... "I am the king of this land. You have found my secret hideout." > You plead with him and say "I am also in hiding and without money, I spent it all on strippers. Please let me stay here" You plead with him and say "I am also in hiding and without money, I spent it all on strippers. Please let me stay here." "I see that you are telling the truth," he says. > You say "So can I stay here?" "Yes, you may stay here," he answers. He leads you through the secret passage in his room and into his castle. You see several people at tables eating and drinking. > You introduce yourself to the people. You curiously look at other people in the room. There is a single large table that is empty except for the king's left and right hands: The Good Cop and the Bad Cop.You kiss the good cop and punch the bad cop. The king appears shocked by your rudeness. "I am not familiar with this concept," he says. > You say "I'm sorry, being a plumber, I don't know much about fancy talk." You apologize and say "I'm sorry, being a plumber, I don't know much about fancy talk." "Ah, I see," the king says. "You're an American." "Yes," You flood the castle. You flood the castle. "I'm sorry, being a plumber, I don't know much about fancy talk." ?
AIPD EP171 – 9/6/2020 – Story 2
Posted under AIPD EP171 - 9/6/2020 - Story 2, Story On By Chief